who would win in a fight between...

[Clexeus]

meh, don't know about half of what you're saying. :p

Post - 500

[Clexeus]

and 500 posts ftw! Just had to do that! :)

Post - 501

[Frazzle_d]

X-Men's Demons start up by stepping forward and starting some sidetracked speech about some comic book philosophy.

They stepped too far. Aggro.

CoX demons win by 'attack first, stupid one liners later' tactic.

[oldsage]

[ QUOTE ]
X-Men's Demons start up by stepping forward and starting some sidetracked speech about some comic book philosophy.

They stepped too far. Aggro.

CoX demons win by 'attack first, stupid one liners later' tactic.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ok as you left it open i set 1 winnie the pooh and gandi....

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Ok as you left it open i set 1 winnie the pooh and gandi....

[/ QUOTE ]

This one's quite easy. In the bizarre set of circumstances what would allow Winnie The Pooh to face off against Gandhi, it would be a stalemate, since they're both non-violent entities. of course, Ben Kingsley would then wander over and rip Winnie The Pooh to shreds. Gandhi wins.

Battle Of The Sci-Fi/Fantasy Women:

Jadzia Dax (ST:DS9) vs Padme Amidala (SW prequels) vs Aeryn Sun (Farscape) vs Col. Wilma Deering (Buck Rogers in the 25th century) vs Sister Psyche (some random MMO game)

[KeeperOfSorrows]

Things start out looking badly for Team Trek as there is a last minute substitution for Jadzia--some treknobabble about the previous host dying and the symbiote being transferred into a new host--which the judges are in two minds over allowing, but eventually Ezri Dax steps into the ring.

As the other competitors arrive, Sister Psyche suffers terrible migraine at attempting to block out the myriad of fan-boy fantasies playing out in the minds of the onlooking crowd. She has to bow out of the competition, and after allowing a substitution for Team Trek, the judges grudgingly agree to grant one to the Gaming Gang. As Swan steps into the ring, whimpers of pain can be heard from the rapidly retreating Sister Psyche.

Padme Amidala arrives with her hair in a complicated stacked-style and wearing a slightly impractical looking, but figure hugging kimono-stlye dress. The fan-boy's in the audience glare enviously at the sponge-boy in the Force Force's corner.

Aeryn Sun's and Wilma Deering's entrances are far lower key, but still garner as much attention from their respective fan-bases.

The bell tolls off the start of round one, and Ezri is the first to come out fighting, firing off a phaser--set to stun--in the direction of Padme, who takes the blast square in the chest and crumples to the ground. Ezri lines up a second shot at Swan, but the beam diffuses harmlessly off of one of her force fields.

Meanwhile, Aeryn and Wilma take to hand-to-hand combat. It's a close run fight, but Aeryn's harsher Peacekeeper training seems to be giving her a slight edge as the bell rings for the end of round one. At this point, it is revealled that the combatant put forward to fight in the Force Force's corner--still to regain consciousness after the phaser blast--is not actually Padme at all, but a decoy! The "sponge-boy" so hated by the fan-boys moments ago, steps forwards and reveals herself to be the actual Padme. She runs off to change into a sleek, white cat suit and returns just in time for round two.

This time, expecting Ezri's move, Padme jumps forward into a barrel roll, the phaser beam shooting overhead, and comes up holding her own blaster, which she uses to return fire. Ezri is startled when a hit on her phaser leaves it useless, and she scrambles for cover while she attempts to repair it. Seeing this errupting fire-fight, Aeryn and Wilma break out their respective ranged weapons and they and Padme have a three-sided shoot out, in the middle of which stands Swan, surrounded by a Personal Force Field, eagerly watching for the moment she can lower her defence and go on the offence. No opportunity presents itself, and the five combatants return to their respective corners--yes, it's a pentagon shaped ring!--as the bell signals the end of round two.

As round three is about to get under way, there's no sign of Padme, who had returned to her dressing room with the intention of donning yet another outfit for the round. Unfortunately, she had far too many to choose from, and her absence sees her eliminated from the competition. Her team-mates appeal to the judges for an allowance to field their own substitute, but the judges point out that they had technically already done so when they had the decoy take Padme's place for round one. The Star Wars side wander off, muttering something about "turning to the Dark Side", and the remaining four women square off for the next round.

This time around, Swan is the first to come out fighting, as she is still remarkedly rested from having played the first two rounds on the defence. She starts letting fly with the psionic blasts, and as we all know, very few have any resistance to that particular power set. Aeryn is the first to fall to the scantily clad heroines attack, who then turns her attentions to Colonel Deering. Wilma manages to retaliate with a few blasts from her laser pistol, but the Dispersion Bubble Swan has raised takes most of power out of the attack. Wilma dives for cover behind some conveniently placed cardboard scenery, but the Psionic Dart Swan released follows Wilma around the corner, the "to hit" calculation having already been resolved by the game engine.

It all looks as if the match is over, but just then Ezri causes a rupture in the subspace continuum by crossing the phase couplings with the plasma inverter in her defunct weapon, all of which transports the entire auditorium into an alternate reality where, not only is Jadzia still alive and had been declared the winner of the match, but the whole fight took place in a mud pit. The winners: the fan-boys.

Okay, time for the nostalgia round, with the Rubiks Cube vs. the Slinky vs. Pong

[Silver_Weasel]

Well, purely going by my own Xmas's.

Pong is thrown across the room after I beat brother 1 by getting the serve and winning 15-0.
The Slinky is stretched 'to see if it still works' by brother 2.
The Rubik Cube is said to be 'for geeks' and thrown against the wall, but can be rebuilt.

Professor Rubix wins. (Also rans are the Subbuteo goal getting sat on, Mousetrap not working and Buckaroo being broken. Bitter, moi? :D)

BBC vs. ITV. vs SKY?

[__HH__]

Sky kicks off proceedings by attempting a hostile takeover off ITV - BBC, however, calls in its government allies and halts this under the monopolies legislation then launches a counter attack by raising legitimate concerns about Rupert Murdoch's exact involvement with certain mid-East happenings...

ITV is miffed at appearing to hide behind the BBC and forges a secret alliance with Sky who are now bad-mouthing the BBC (via Fox News).

This harsh criticism from the States causes the government to relent allowing Sky to buy out ITV. The BBC is slapped down heavily but boils quietly awaiting a rematch chance...

Akira vs Microsoft

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Akira vs Microsoft

[/ QUOTE ]

Not hijacking this fight, merely entering one as an aside:

Stasis versus KeeperOfSorrow's forum avatar.

I got £10 on the avatar winning.

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

DP up the wazoo.

[Stasisesque]

[ QUOTE ]
Stasis versus KeeperOfSorrow's forum avatar.

I got £10 on the avatar winning.

[/ QUOTE ]

I won't fight it. You can't make me. You're just cruel you are.

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

Excellent. Tenner to me.

Now, the previous fight, I believe, was

Akira versus Microsoft

[Silver_Weasel]

Akira Wins (http://whiteafrican.com/wp-content/blue-screen-of-death_1152.jpg)

Chun Li (Streetfighter 2) vs. Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) vs. Joanna Dark (Perfect Dark) vs. Princess Peach (Mario) in a Time Trial.

[EasyTiger]

I have no idea but I may have inappropriate thoughts whilst watching it :)

- who would win if it was
Deadpool vs Ash from the Evil Dead?

[CBeet]

[ QUOTE ]
I have no idea but I may have inappropriate thoughts whilst watching it :)

- who would win if it was
Deadpool vs Ash from the Evil Dead?

[/ QUOTE ]

Ash would win, hand(s) down!

skeletor
vs
darth vader

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Chun Li (Streetfighter 2) vs. Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) vs. Joanna Dark (Perfect Dark) vs. Princess Peach (Mario) in a Time Trial.

[/ QUOTE ]

I have no idea who Princess Peach is. I know of a Princess Daisy, but any and all attempts to change her name sicken me to the core.

In fact, were there to be a fight, she'd get confused when her name is called, and be disqualified for not entering the ring. Chun Li, once billed as "The World's Strongest Woman", gets turned into a steaming pile of pixels as Joanna Dark and Lara Croft go at it. The Fan Boys all dogpile Lara, and bombard her with faked nude pictures, whilst Joanna Dark, having left her fans getting old and grey in between Perfect Dark 64 and Perfect Dark Zero, has no fans to speak of, save a few nerdy guys who love the new Multiplayer. Whilst Lara is distracted, and torn between personalities ("Am I Angelina Jolie, or do I work in Top Shop?") Joanna beats Lara over the head with an N64, proving herself to be the victor. Sadly, nobody cares, and the Fanboys all kill Joanna Dark for hurting their fantasy woman.

Who wins? Certainly not me.

As for Skeletor Versus Darth Vader, it's clearly going to be Vader. Man made out of bones, versus a man made out of bones -and- metal? Dark Side FTW.

[DreamWeaver]

Forgot a new fight. I think ol'boney needs another shot at the title, so let's kick him down a weight class...

Skeletor
vs
Mumm-Ra the eeevvveeerrr-lliiivviiinnggg (why did he always have to say that every goram time?)
vs
Venger
vs
Catra

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Why Don't You? vrs, Blue Peter

[Silver_Weasel]

Mumm-ra got beaten up by a cat, Venger got beaten up by a bunch of school kids, and Catra....oh good grief...rides a Pink Lion...

Skeletor was defeated, but never beaten; so wins this round :) (If only for that wonderful laugh :))

As for Blue Peter vs. Why don't you?

Depends heavily.

If it's Noakes, Purvis, Judd and Singleton; WDY lose on style, bike-riding, appearances and guts, as well as Shep and Petra. Though WDY gets bonus points for the stripey socks.
If it's Greene, Duncan and Ellis, it's a closer battle, but pure heart-throbs gives a win for Blue Peter again.
Curry, Keating, Fielding era is a straight loss for Blue Peter for numerous reasons against fashion. WDY doesn't even have to compete.
WDY have an almost straight win for the years 90-95, despite having Russel 'Tardis' Davies in there; but then give up leaving Blue Peter the eventual winners; but probably beaten into the floor by Neighbours.

Now there's a good battle...

Neighbours vs. Home & Away vs. Brooky vs. Shoddyoaks vs. Prisoner Cell Block H vs. Eastenders vs. Coro. in a soap battle.

(Straight wins for Neighbours under the "Kylie is in it" are appreciated, but not allowed ;))

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Neighbours vs. Home & Away vs. Brooky vs. Shoddyoaks vs. Prisoner Cell Block H vs. Eastenders vs. Coro. in a soap battle.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, Brookside Close ended because of poor ratings, IIRC, so that's out. Neighbours and Home & Away have shared so much cast, they're indistinguishable. They are...Home & ANeigh. Cell Block H probably won't be remembered by a lot of the tykes on here, so it's discounted. Hollywood....uhh...oaks gets disqualified for the pseudo-incest of letting the younger brother and sister of the "2.4 Children" kids get together. Sickening.

Now, it's Home & ANeigh versus Eastenders Vs Quality...uhm...Coronation Street. And only one of these has killed off Leslie Grantham. Twice. Also, it's the only soap I can recall where one old lady performed Euthenasia on another old lady, one old man was cracked over the head by his wife with a frying pan (pre Weasel's Wok days) and, despite all this, the most exciting thing to happen in years was the arrival of the Slater sisters, because every straight man, or bi/lesbian woman will tell you, the youngest one was smokin' HAWT.

Eastenders FTW, and FG Productions would like to invite you to:

ATTACK OF THE GIANT STOMPY ROBOTS!

Optimus Prime (G1) versus Optimus Prime (G2) versus Optimus Prime (Powermaster) versus Optimus Prime (Action Master) versus Optimus Primal (Beast Wars) versus Optimus Prime (Robots In Disguise) versus Optimus Prime (Armada/Energon) versus Optimus Prime (Cybertron).

As they say in Banzai....WHOOO WI' WIN? PRACE BET NOW!

[Lost_samurai_EU]

5 mil inf on Optimus Prime

[Coin]

[ QUOTE ]
5 mil inf on Optimus Prime

[/ QUOTE ]

No no, I bet 2 million Quatloos.....errm, inf on Optimus Prime!

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]
ATTACK OF THE GIANT STOMPY ROBOTS!

Optimus Prime (G1) versus Optimus Prime (G2) versus Optimus Prime (Powermaster) versus Optimus Prime (Action Master) versus Optimus Primal (Beast Wars) versus Optimus Prime (Robots In Disguise) versus Optimus Prime (Armada/Energon) versus Optimus Prime (Cybertron).

As they say in Banzai....WHOOO WI' WIN? PRACE BET NOW!

[/ QUOTE ]

Hasbro, who are by now just printing money.

Cadbury's Dairy Milk vs Fair Trade vs Bournville vs Milky Bar? (Just for Easter)

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
ATTACK OF THE GIANT STOMPY ROBOTS!

Optimus Prime (G1) versus Optimus Prime (G2) versus Optimus Prime (Powermaster) versus Optimus Prime (Action Master) versus Optimus Primal (Beast Wars) versus Optimus Prime (Robots In Disguise) versus Optimus Prime (Armada/Energon) versus Optimus Prime (Cybertron).

As they say in Banzai....WHOOO WI' WIN? PRACE BET NOW!

[/ QUOTE ]

Hasbro, who are by now just printing money.

Cadbury's Dairy Milk vs Fair Trade vs Bournville vs Milky Bar? (Just for Easter)

[/ QUOTE ]

Pffft. Dark chocolate FTW!

[Shotaro]

[ QUOTE ]
Hasbro, who are by now just printing money.

[/ QUOTE ]
lmfao! sad put possibly true :/


hmm my conscience would say Fair Trade however i killed him long ago and thus milky bar FTW!

what about
Frank Miller vs Alan Moore vs Marv Wolfman

[Silver_Weasel]

Frank Miller is writing comics about the Al Queda.
Alan Moore is watching Hero-Sex and complaining about how the pots of money from his films don't make up for them not being true to the original.
Marv Wolfman is on the Teen Titans, and as Stase will tell you, wins by default :)

Cigarettes vs Alcohol vs. Chocolate vs Coffee (wait for it...)
in a "Thing you'd most like to spend the night with"

[Freedom_Falcon2]

alcohol all the waaay!

ok ok.. it needs saying..

Sesame Street vs the Muppets in a battle tag royale

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]
alcohol all the waaay!

ok ok.. it needs saying..

Sesame Street vs the Muppets in a battle tag royale

[/ QUOTE ]

Already done (http://uk.boards.cityofheroes.com/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=327542&page=&view=&sb=5&o =&fpart=48&vc=1)

The Cook vs. The Thief vs. His Wife vs. Her Lover.

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

The wife and lover tag-team. Lesbianism FTW!

Uhh....assuming that 'her lover' is female. Admittedly, I have no idea who you're talking about, so I'm gonna make stuff up.

Sesame Street Vs Avenue Q

[Shotaro]

[ QUOTE ]
Frank Miller is writing comics about the Al Queda.
Alan Moore is watching Hero-Sex and complaining about how the pots of money from his films don't make up for them not being true to the original.
Marv Wolfman is on the Teen Titans, and as Stase will tell you, wins by default :)

[/ QUOTE ]

lol in the case of moore and miller that is sadly all too true but what about at their peak?

how can you decide whos better when marv did COIE, miller did Sin City and DKR and Moore did the Watchmen?

as for your fight fire guardian what in the name of all thats holy is avenue Q? - Sesame street would win because <ul type="square">
Burt is Evil They could easily make traps that dropped vats of cookie dough on most of avenue Q and then set the cookie monster loose (the old one before he got his cookie eating powers nerfed by health organizations)
Elmo would tickle those that remained to weaken them oscar threw dustbin lids ernie would set loose an army of mechanical rubber duckies [/list]

all that without big bird or any other characters i can't quite remember!

as you can see sesame street could easily have won in 'nam :p 101st Sesame Street Division FTW!

[Silver_Weasel]

If it's in their heyday, Miller guts Wolfman in a shower of white blood on the cold, dark streets; then gets an alien TP'd onto him by Moore. Moore wins.

Jessica Simpson vs Britney Spears vs Ashlee Simpson vs Mary Kate/Ashley in a 'who can count up to 10' match?

[Shotaro]

Britney starts well by counting her fingers however she only uses her left hand "1,2,3,4,5,....7?"

Jessica Simpson manages 2, only able to count the number of body parts that keep her famous....

Ashlee simpson gets to 10 flawlessly however the count continues to 11 without her moving her lips she realises shes busted and runs off crying

Mary Kate and Ashely fall into the same trap as britney, but because they are twins and they have two left hands, they manage to successfully count to 10

Martian Manhunter vs Batman, Superman and Wonderwoman in a 3 on 1 handicap match

[balrog74]

I think Batman, Superman and Wonderwoman would win.
If it was only Batman and Wonderwoman then Martian Manhunter would win, but Manhunter is only a little more powerful than Superman (or that's what i read :) ). Sure, he has telepathic abilities so he maybe can read what attacks the others have planned but the teamwork of the three would make them winners i think.


Minion (Death's Head) vs Venom (both amongst my favorite villains :) )

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Beetroot vrs. Radishes

[DreamWeaver]

My god... it's back from the dead... the thread's alive... ALIIIIVE!!!

What have you done, Mutha? What has science unleashed?

Beetroot potentially damaging due to staining power, but nothing compared to explosive power of the almighty Atomic Radish. (Do miss teaming with him).

Charles Clarke vs A Paper Bag

[balrog74]

[ QUOTE ]
Beetroot vrs. Radishes

[/ QUOTE ]


Ummmm....you forgot the rules. You have to write the outcome of the above fight first. :)

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Venom. Just cos.

[Silver_Weasel]

Charles Clarke, because unlike the paper bag he has unlimited hot air inside him.

Spines/Regen Scrapper vs. Spines/Regen Stalker?

[The_Thorny_Devil]

The stalker, simply because his AS is better and scrappers suck!!

Blade + Spiderman VS Statesman + Longbow Flamthrower!

[Lost_samurai_EU]

blades katana would shatter against statesman because he would buff himself up so he cannot lose, meanwhile spidey swings around and webs flamethrower, however at this point a villain in recluses victory secures enough pillboxes and statesman is automatically sent there to stop him, spidey and blade win by default.
i disagree with the stalekr winning tho, the scrapper would have his damage aura on so ASing would be a nitemare and would almost certainly have focused accuracy anyway and commence pounding the stalker.

PPD cops, doc quantum, a ice tank and trick arrow defender vs sephiroth.

[The_Thorny_Devil]

[ QUOTE ]
blades katana would shatter against statesman because he would buff himself up so he cannot lose, meanwhile spidey swings around and webs flamethrower, however at this point a villain in recluses victory secures enough pillboxes and statesman is automatically sent there to stop him, spidey and blade win by default.
i disagree with the stalekr winning tho, the scrapper would have his damage aura on so ASing would be a nitemare and would almost certainly have focused accuracy anyway and commence pounding the stalker.

PPD cops, doc quantum, a ice tank and trick arrow defender vs sephiroth.

[/ QUOTE ]

Your jokeing arnt you? LMAO
Blade wouldn't be so stupid to use his Katana on statesman till he knows his buffs are down due to spidys webs, the longbow guy would be strung up by a web and spidy would be imposible to catch. And i very much doubt that blade would let statesman get away with out finishing it for good!

[Lost_samurai_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
blades katana would shatter against statesman because he would buff himself up so he cannot lose, meanwhile spidey swings around and webs flamethrower, however at this point a villain in recluses victory secures enough pillboxes and statesman is automatically sent there to stop him, spidey and blade win by default.
i disagree with the stalekr winning tho, the scrapper would have his damage aura on so ASing would be a nitemare and would almost certainly have focused accuracy anyway and commence pounding the stalker.

PPD cops, doc quantum, a ice tank and trick arrow defender vs sephiroth.

[/ QUOTE ]

Your jokeing arnt you? LMAO
Blade wouldn't be so stupid to use his Katana on statesman till he knows his buffs are down due to spidys webs, the longbow guy would be strung up by a web and spidy would be imposible to catch. And i very much doubt that blade would let statesman get away with out finishing it for good!

[/ QUOTE ]
either ways spidey wins, if its the spidey frm the cartoon series he run out of webbing just when hes about to hold states tho. Or states unleashes ultimate ED to balance everything in the universe resulting in a draw, i dunno i make this up as i go along, at least galactus didnt win :)

[Silver_Weasel]

*BURRRP*

Galactus wins :)

The Number 2 vs The Letter R vs The Exclamation mark.

[KeeperOfSorrows]

The letter R rolls into the ring, ready to rumble. Second is 2 who, being featured in the titles of many of the worlds worst films, figures itself to be outnumbered and asks to be counted out. The judges are about to parse sentance, but then, last to arrive is the exclamation mark... who turns up on the chest of Freakazoid! With a rage-filled roar of "R's", R relents, relinquishing the right of Ruler of the Rumble to the exclamation mark, and everyone agrees is was a capital fight!

Next up: The Oxford English Dictionary vs Roget's Thesaurus

[balrog74]

Personally I like the books from Penguin Books most.
But anyway The Oxford Dictionary Of English wins pretty easy, it crushes Roget's Thesaurus with a knockout in the first round with 2110 pages against 1296 pages. :D


Conan The Barbarian vs Connor "The Highlander" MacLeod + Victor Kruger (The Kurgan) in a 1 vs 2 handicap match

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Connor and the Kurgan would hide for 60 years and then come and torment Conan in his wheel-chair at the old peoples home.

[biogirl]

the Midnighter Vs The Incredible Hulk

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Ravenswing vrs. Silver Weasal? :o

[biogirl]

silver weasel wins hands down(just cuz)
silver weasel Vs Stasis
(Runs to hide)

[balrog74]

[ QUOTE ]
Connor and the Kurgan would hide for 60 years and then come and torment Conan in his wheel-chair at the old peoples home.

[/ QUOTE ]


ROFLMAO....that was funny! :D

[Gall_]

[ QUOTE ]
the Midnighter Vs The Incredible Hulk

[/ QUOTE ]

As much as I love the Midnighter....I'd have to say imho the Hulk would win.

Midnighter's attacks couldn't even hurt him. He's just not strong enough.

[Tac_Ops_Wolf]

Yeah, could you now post your fight? :p

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Hulk ftw!

Socks for i-pods vrs. Lanyards for mobile phones.

Both equally worthless IMHO and by extention:

People with socks for their i-pods vrs. People with lanyards for their mobile phones.

Again, both equally worthless IMHO.

[Brimmy]

yeee, i havent read all them posts but i'm gonna go ahead and but in anyways :p

childish as i am....

Turtles VS. Carebears who wins?
personally i go for Carebears :D

[DreamWeaver]

Turtles' ninja skills may look 'l33t, but are comprehensively pwned and perma-mezzed by the revolting cuteness of Care Bear controllers, which they just keep up until their brains implode messily. Sad really.

Great Evil Beards Of Our Time:

Ming The Merciless
vs
Genghis Khan
vs
Sir Alan Sugar
vs
Noel Edmonds

Chuck Norris barred from ringside due to me being too damn tired of "ZOMG Norris PWNZ!" jokes.

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

David Bellamy should be in any list of bearded hard-men IMHO.

And Brian Blessed. Ho Ho Ho.

[DreamWeaver]

True, but it isn't an evil beard. Rather friendly in fact. Brian Blessed reminds me a lot of my dad ...*schniff*...

Bellamy's beard, however, does resemble some kind of Devouring Earth mutant lichen attached to his face, so he's in.

Revised match table...

David Bellamy
vs
Ming The Merciless
vs
Genghis Khan
vs
Sir Alan Sugar
vs
Noel Edmonds
vs
Billy Gibbons (ZZ Top)


Chuck Norris *still* barred from ringside due to me being too damn tired of "ZOMG Norris PWNZ!" jokes.

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

I have found this rather distubing link (http://www.secretlair.com/babieswithbeards/) on the state of beardy-ness.

DW could you start a seperate thread on Beards and possibly another on The Threat of Gingervitus ?

[DreamWeaver]

I have something of a thing for redheads and gyngers, so no.

As to the other one... 2 minutes please.

And you still haven't answered the battle question.

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Well if its Maximillion Schnell playing Ming in the wonderful Flash Gordan then Ming has to be the winner. Facial topery of the highest standard.

So you've got something for strawberry blondes have you DW? Care to elaborate?

[DreamWeaver]

Not touching that one with 600ft bargepole. Too many issues.

Set next fight please Mutha?

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

Tupperware vrs. Bettaware

One a neat means of preserving pre-prepared foods and transporting them. The other a cheap tawdry knock-off.

One a means of providing middle-age women a means of gathering socially. The other a eco-unfriendly catalogue on your doorstep delivered by an ASBO'ed chav teen l33t speaker.

[Lost_samurai_EU]

tupperware, bettaware will never beat the preservative goodness :)

shadow the hedgehog vs vincent (FF7)
both armed with best weapons, items etc.
no outside interference allowed

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]
silver weasel wins hands down(just cuz)
silver weasel Vs Stasis
(Runs to hide)

[/ QUOTE ]

QFT :D

[Acenra]

by the powers that be, I say Shadow. just cos I made a random descision. but it would be Shadow's speed and spin attack that would give him the imediate advantage.

anyway, here's the first fight i'm submitting:

a giant tetris block VS. a frog with a hand grenade :p

[balrog74]

[ QUOTE ]
by the powers that be, I say Shadow. just cos I made a random descision. but it would be Shadow's speed and spin attack that would give him the imediate advantage.

anyway, here's the first fight i'm submitting:

a giant tetris block VS. a frog with a hand grenade :p

[/ QUOTE ]

The frog fumbles with the hand grenade when trying to pull the pin while the giant tetris block quickly comes closer, so he desperately tries to pull the pin with his mouth and accidentally swallows it and chokes on it which startles him so he forgets about the giant tetris block which now crushes down on him and a second later the hand grenade goes boom and pulverizes the giant tetris block so IT'S A DRAW!!! :D

Jet Li
vs Bruce Lee
vs Jackie Chan
vs Steven Seagal
vs Hulk Hogan

in an All vs All match (if all of them were in their best age) :p

[balrog74]

Maybe it was too hard cause noone is replying, so I say that Bruce Lee wins just cause he was the best. :cool:
Ok a new fight:

Wolverine vs Venom

[Coin]

[ QUOTE ]
Jet Li
vs Bruce Lee
vs Jackie Chan
vs Steven Seagal
vs Hulk Hogan

in an All vs All match (if all of them were in their best age) :p

[/ QUOTE ]

Nope, not too hard, just needs some thought as it's such a titanic battle :)

Ok, First up, Jet Li comes out quickly whilst Master Bruce quietly takes off his jacket and starts to size up his opponents. Jackie Chan bounds up and starts to tipr over some rope before rolling along the floor and turning the rope into a powerful weapon and attacking the Hulkster who is stood in the middle of everyone, snarling and posing.

Meanwhile, Seagal is struggling to get out of his chair due to his massive bulk and lardiosity slowing him down..

Bruce Lee stands quietly, watching Jet li who throws himself into a dazzling set of Wushu acrobatic moves, and begins to break his own bones by flexing his muscles first.

Hulk hogan attacks Chan, scooping him up in his arms and trying to bear hug him before Chan wriggles out of his grasp, down through his shorts and out the back of them, alsmot choking to death from the smell of a jock strap that has been throguh a million "real" wrestling matches!

Hogan goes for Chan with a metal chair, but Chan just jumps through though chair, bounces off the ropes and then bounces innefectively off the chest of Hogan. In sheer panic, he runs to the edge of the ring and is tagged out by a man who can out bulk even the Hulkster....Sammo Hung. Hung then proceeds to take Hogan apart using the dextrous acrobatic skillz that a man of his size should JUST NOT POSSESS!! IT'S NOT NATURAL, I TELL YOU!!!

Now that Hogan is on the ropes he collapses to the ground under the weight of Hung and starts to be pinned, only for the true source of his power to be unleashed.....as he begins to wave his finger in the air, signalling to the screaming hordes of fans that he's about to recover and win the match....until Jackie Chan comes up and breaks the finger, defeating the Hulkster in the process.

Meanwhile, Li and Lee begin to fight in a blistering set of martial arts moves. Lee attacks Li, Li fights back to attack Li and Lee defends against Li's marvellous movies and speed. It's Lee, Li, Li, Lee, Li, Li, Lee leeliileleelileeleelililileeli.....and this writer gets very confused when Bruce Leigh, Bruce Li, Bruce Leung, Bruce Lie and many other clones appear out nowhere and to add to the fun.

Suddenly, Bruce Lee unleashes a powerful attack that even the speed of Jet li can't see coming, jumps up into the air, lands on Li's head, lets out a slow motion scream and it's game over, man, game over......befor wondering where the hell Hudson came into all of this.

This leave Bruce Lee, the King of Martial Arts vs Jackie Chan, the Clown Prince of Martial Arts, to finish off this epic battle of true Martial Arts prowess.

However, just as the Ultimate Showdown begins (this time without Chuck Norris, as Bruce Lee soundly beat him once already) another Martial Arts legend comes flying in to remind everyone this is actually a comic book thread and Batman defeats both Lee and Chan without breaking a sweat.

So the winner - Batman, by a comic book crossover move.

Ok, I'll let someone else do Wolverine Vs Venom :)

[Duckdee]

Brilliant!

[balrog74]

LOL...nice work, Coin_! You can choose a new fight if you want and we forget Wolverine vs Venom. Otherwise Wolverine vs Venom is on now... :p

[Fury_BoB_Doc]

venom hands down, "ooh i can cut u into ppieces with my clawws" *snap* "my spine"

Chuck Norris Vs captain america Vs Statesman Vs Iron Man Vs green arrow

[KeeperOfSorrows]

[ QUOTE ]
LOL...nice work, Coin_! You can choose a new fight if you want and we forget Wolverine vs Venom. Otherwise Wolverine vs Venom is on now... :p

[/ QUOTE ]

Already been done: Click Here (http://uk.boards.cityofheroes.com/showflat.php?Cat=&amp;Number=327542&amp;page=0&amp;view=collap sed&amp;sb=5&amp;o=&amp;fpart=43&amp;vc=1) and scroll down a few posts.

Perhaps, inspired by Coin's post in the pTerry thread, we could have: Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, and Magrat Garlick vs. The Freedom Phalanx and Lord Recluse and his cronies?

[Lost_samurai_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
venom hands down, "ooh i can cut u into ppieces with my clawws" *snap* "my spine"

Chuck Norris Vs captain america Vs Statesman Vs Iron Man Vs green arrow

[/ QUOTE ]

Chuck norris fever has died down now so he gets taken out by angry anti chuck fans who storm the battlefield. Captain America starts an argument with states about him ripping him off. Iron man annihalates green arrow in the meantime.
Many hours later when states and cap have finished arguring and come to a conclusion they notice a faint beeping, and look around to see several hundred bombs designed by Ironman, 3 secodns later Ironman flies back down and surveys the wreckage, claiming himslef the victor and stealing states face plate. Might be worth something :)

sets up for next battle as Positron appears to find what hasd happened, seeing the wreckage he comes to the conclusion that iron man is a villain thus
Positron vs Iron man

[Coin]

[ QUOTE ]
Perhaps, inspired by Coin's post in the pTerry thread, we could have: Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, and Magrat Garlick vs. The Freedom Phalanx and Lord Recluse and his cronies?

[/ QUOTE ]

It was a dark night in Croatoa as Statesman and the rest of the Freedom Phalanx arrived for their meeting.

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Marcus?" said Sister Psyche, looking around warily. "I mean, teaming up with..."
"Me? Oh I think even I can be trusted for this battle, my dear" came a voice from behind the group. Statesman span round quickly, knowing what to expect, but stood ready anyway. In front of him stood Lord Recluse, in all his multi-armed glory and the rest of his gang of evil cronies.
"Recluse!" he said, almost spitting in his anger at having to help his arch enemy. "You've got five minutes to convince me before we start to discuss this in our usual manner"
"Ok, Marcus, my....old friend" Recluse replied, with a sardonic grin. "I've heard of a magical power in these parts that worries even me, something possibly more powerful than even both our teams combined! I thought that perhaps, we could...put aside our differences, just this once?"
"And what evil is this? What force could have even you running scared?" responded Statesman, folding his arms in a gesture of disbelief.

"Blessings be upon this....hmmph, field will have to do, I think." said a harsh voice from out of the mist.
"Ooooh, Esme, will you stop complaining, this is a lovely field. I've had many a fun night in a field like this one." came another, more bouncy voice, in response.
"Well, that's because you are nothing more than disgusting baggage, Gytha Ogg, and you know I can't be doing with that kind of talk, IF you don't mind!"
"Oh Granny, you know she only says these things to upset you, why do you let her so." came a third, more....wet, voice.
"Well, I'm sure I don't know what you mean, young Magrat! Now, will you please lay the blanket on the floor so we can begin? This whole place reeks of bad magic to me! Those daft apeths from the Cabal are running this poor place ragged!" said the first voice, as the three women came into view. "Oh, seems we have some company already. Magrta, more cups of tea, if you please."

"NO! We're too late! They're already here!" screamed Recluse, backing away in fear. "We need to attack them first! Mako, get them!!"
Before any of the heroes had chance to react, the shark-headed monstrosity known as Mako threw himself at the witches, snarling in fury.
"Awww, look, a fishie for you, Greebo! Now go eat, there's a good kitty" said the more plump witch of the three, reaching into her pinny and taking out what appeared to be a grievously dangerous rag and tossing at Mako. Before the monster could brake his speed, the rag suddenly developed four sets of claws and a nasty like smile and suddenly Mako was on the run as the rag erupted into a explasion of claws and fur. "Awww, bless 'im, he does like a nice piece of fish, the little poppet!"
"Recluse, you lying toad, this is the evil you told us about? Two old women and a young girl?"
"Erm, excuse me young man! I thank you not to call Nanny and Magrat old women, if you don't mind!" said Granny Weatherwax, staring at Statesman with a look that spoke to the little boy that lurked in the back of his mind and made him want to hang his head and scuff his shoes in shame.
"Ummm, sry grny!" he mumbled.

"And as for you, young man" said Granny, turning to Recluse and fixing him with a similar stare.
"Nooo, stop her, Ghost Widow, rip her mind apart!"
"Ermm, excuse me", came a less timid voice from behind Granny, as the younger witch stepped forward "but perhaps we can discuss this first, after all, violence is never the answer, is it?"
The evil waif-like form of ghost Widow floated further towards the witches, a sick smile spreading acros her face.
"Oh, I find violence of a less direct sort is often the ans...what...No...NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" screamed Ghost Widow, falling to the floor, waving her arms in abject terror.
"My gods, what....what did she do to her?" said Sister Psyche in awe.
"Well, if this waste of a witch used her magic to look inside the mind of this daft young besom, no doubt she saw something her evil mind couldn't comprehend.....which knowing Magrat would have been something wet, like fluffy puppy dogs and the like. Makes even me shudder, to be perfectly honest, but she seems happy with it"
"Well, Recluse, if this is the evil you wanted us to help you fight, I think you may have been mistaken" said Statesman, turning to his arch foe with a grin on his face. "I suggest you take your...friends and leave, whislt you still have the chance. Phalanx....GET THEM!"

All around them the Freedom Phalanx erupted into action, quickly attacking the villains of Arachnos and routing them in seconds, sending them scurrying into their waiting ships.
"Curse you Statesman, I'll get you for this! And you, old woman.....we'll meet again, you mark my words, we'll meet again"
"Oh, you can count on that....young man!" replied Granny Weatherwax, with a steely tone in her voice that made Recluse visibly gulp in terror. "Well, Mr Statement. I can see things are well in hand here, so I don't think we'll be needed after all. You carry on the good work and try not to be so trusting of people you should know not to trust next time. If someone starts out as a bad egg, they usually stay that way, I find"
"I certainly will, Ma'a....ermm, Granny!" replied Statesman, wishing he had a cap he could take off, just so he could wring it in his hands.
"Right then, we'll be off. Come on Magrat, and come along Nanny, leave that poor young man with the bow and arrows along....no, I don't want to know how big his weapon is. I've said it before and I'll say it again....you're nothing more than disgusting old baggage, Gytha Ogg. Well, that Sister woman seemed nice enough, I suppose, but that Widow woman, well, if that's what they call a witch around here, well, they ain't what they were in our day, that's all I can say!"
Sister Psyche moved nearer to Statesman and clutched his arm.
"Marcus....who was that?"
"I'm not sure....but damn, I'm glad they're on our side!"

[DreamWeaver]

*blink*

Best. Fanfic. Ever.

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
*blink*

Best. Fanfic. Ever.

[/ QUOTE ]

Scarily true.

Supergran versus Supergirl versus Ms Liberty

[KeeperOfSorrows]

I doff my hat to you, good sir Coin, for that was indeed a most remarkable and humourous read. I especially liked the pune's, or "play on words" :D

[Naz_Nomad]

[ QUOTE ]
Supergran versus Supergirl versus Ms Liberty

[/ QUOTE ]

Supergirl and Miss Lib swoop down and look all heroic at each other before turning the whole of Atlas Park into some sort of super-nuked wasteland with their superpowered battling! Then Supergran gets wheeled in and berates the both of them, beats them with an old umbrella she doesn't even have to open, she's THAT hard. Then Supergirl and Miss Lib team up to attack Supergran, but end up feeling so guilty attacking an old woman using their super-powers that they lose badly and have to tidy their bedrooms before the servers come back up.


Hong Kong Fuey vs Statesman

[DreamWeaver]

In a classic case of mistake identity, Phooey thinks Statesman is the evil Dark Helmet and attacks viciously.

However, due to (a) States' incredibly high DEF and (b) incompetence, all Phoo can do is charge around yelping and chopping, missing by miles and hitting hard objects, ever more desperately consulting his manual.

Eventually, he lands one tiny hit - but just as States is poised to deliver a crushing blow to this insignificant threat, Spot pulls one small lever causing the statue of Atlas to tip over on States. No-one notices, and Spot calls his agent asking where he signs for his OWN TV show.

Captain Mal Reynolds vs Han Solo

Bonus points for best hair at the end of the match.

[Lost_samurai_EU]

Han solo strolls out the millenium falcon as Mal jogs walks down the ramp from serenity, both are armed and walking towards each other, they stare at each other intently as the wind blows around them. A twig snaps in the distance and both draw and fire at the other, draw.. both on the floor unable to get back up and their guns out of reach. Both hairstyles in perfect condition still :).
Chewbacca rushes out from the trees where he had accidentally stepped on a branch and sees his friend dying, on the ground but still alive. Jayne leaps off Serenity and towards him. "you gonna pay for that you overgrown mongrel"

Jayne Cobb vs Chewbacca

btw jayne wants Mal to live just until he tells him where the pay is, then he'll leave him to die

[Cognito]

Armed: Mal (Machine gun &gt; Crossbow)

Unarmed: Chewie (Mal cant fight with arms ripped off)

Next:

In an intellectual debate:

George W. Bush vs. Bag of Whelks

[Mr ?]

The Whelks, due to having the higher IQ. :D

Now, a drinking contest:
Zaphod Beeblebrox (TV Series) vs Zaphod Beeblebrox (Movie edition)
With the drinks being Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters

[Acenra]

the movie edition. he looks like a very stable drunk,

a rather silly fight now.

Statesman versus the worlds fastest super computer allied with the internet (represented by a desktop computer with a dial-up connection)

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]

Statesman versus the worlds fastest super computer allied with the internet (represented by a desktop computer with a dial-up connection)

[/ QUOTE ]

"Press any key to begin...WHERE'S THE ANY KEY?"

States loses ;)

California vs. Raisins

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
California vs. Raisins

[/ QUOTE ]

California wins. I heard it through the grape vine.

Macs Vs PCs.

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

PC's. PC users realise they are intrinsically uncool. Mac users are intrinsically deluded.

Lemmy vrs. James Hetfield vrs. Dave Mustaine vrs. Angus Young vrs. Sid Vicious

[Everclear]

Lemmy

James Hetfield is a wuss, Dave Mustaine is done for from the after effects of his drinking problem not to mention his nerve problem in his a arm. Angus Young doesn't have the build, and sid vicious has gone soft now :p :p :p

Ryu vs Akuma from street fighter

[Duckdee]

[ QUOTE ]
the movie edition. he looks like a very stable drunk,

[/ QUOTE ]
TV Zaphod has seperate heads, Movie Zaphod doesn't.

TVZ gets an early lead by taking 2 drinks at once, while MZ takes 1. MZ tries to catch-up by tilting his head back to allow the 2nd face to drink as well.

Drinking whilst tilting your head back is bad, the liquid comes out your nose if you're not careful. This drink being a Pan-Galatic Gargleblaster, MZ loses control of balance after the first gulp, stumbles around, and cracks his head on TV Marvin, who says "I suppose you want me to clean this up?"

Meanwhile, TVZ is having his first coherent conversation his his 2nd head, as they continue to drink.

(H2G2 is my strong point, even if I couldn't bare to finish watching the film...)

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
PC's. PC users realise they are intrinsically uncool. Mac users are intrinsically deluded.

Lemmy vrs. James Hetfield vrs. Dave Mustaine vrs. Angus Young vrs. Sid Vicious

[/ QUOTE ]

Sid Vicious, but only because he inspired Spike from Buffy.

Moving on, Dark Helmet(Spaceballs) vs Darth Vader.

[Frazzle_d]

Dark Helmet wins, as Vader realises he is no better than the laughable parodies about him, and falls to his knees crying 'Nooooooooooooooooo' leaving himself vunerable to attack.

Next!

Egon from Ghostbusters vs. Q from James Bond in 'brainy guy with limited combat skillz' firefight.

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Dark Helmet wins, as Vader realises he is no better than the laughable parodies about him, and falls to his knees crying 'Nooooooooooooooooo' leaving himself vunerable to attack.

Next!

Egon from Ghostbusters vs. Q from James Bond in 'brainy guy with limited combat skillz' firefight.

[/ QUOTE ]

Egon could still bust some heads. Don't forget, he caught one of the Scallari Brothers in Ghostbusters 2.

Hmm. The Movies Ghostbusters versus The Real GHostbusters (cartoon)?

[Lost_samurai_EU]

As the fans try to decide which of the two is better, Akuma and Ryu from a few posts ago turn up, annoyed that their fight was ignored they decided to take their frustration out on the fans, winner akuma and ryu, the ghostbusters are a draw, cartoon series was longer but movie was better than an episode. so they are a draw.

8 spines regen scrappers vs sephiroth

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
Hmm. The Movies Ghostbusters versus The Real GHostbusters (cartoon)?

[/ QUOTE ]

Movies Ghostbusters wins hands down.... it's never a good point to argue with anything that has Sigourney Weaver in it, even if she is inexplicably attracted to Bill Murray.

Erm..... Fox Mulder vs Kermit the Frog

[Cognito]

Kermit, clearly, he has superjump for PvP purposes :p

Hmmm

Me vs. You?

[DreamWeaver]

I have +1 CHA/-1 STR and still pwnz u. :D

Rabid Attack Pandas vs Pirates?

[Acenra]

Pirates, I heard that Rabid attack pandas can't hold down alot of rum, and they can't swim most of the time.


now then: The roman empire vs. all of us vs. a fish with nunchukas!

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
Pirates, I heard that Rabid attack pandas can't hold down alot of rum, and they can't swim most of the time.


now then: The roman empire vs. all of us vs. a fish with nunchukas!

[/ QUOTE ]

Well given that both the Roman Empire and all of us would be laughing at the fish with nunchukas, those fish would completely decimate us.

Unless this is taking place on land, in which case the Romans would watch the fish drown and then would instruct us how to build proper sewers and roads, before our backup visigoths arrived.

So we win!!!

And now..... erm.... Aardvarks vs Mongeese (I'm sure that's totally wrong, but I wasn't typing Mongi.... dammit)

[Days_]

The Aardvarks would win for 2 reasons.

1)they appear first (seeing as they are the second animal to appear in the dictionary)
2)the mongeese are busy arguing amongst themselves as to whether they are mongeese or mongi.

Right, who would win...

Jackie Chan or the Duracell Bunny (it does keep going after all)

[Lost_samurai_EU]

Chan just cant bring himslef to hurt a little bunny that makes so many people happy, this is until it bites him and electrocutes him at the same time. Jackie grabs a ladder and ladder fus the bunny to oblivion. Winner Jackie Chan.

Lord recluse and his lieutenants vs Link, mario, Kirby, samus aran and Fox Mcloud in an SSBM style fight

[Mordranis]

Link would obliterate Mako with the Master sword, Kirby would boil Ghost Widow til she died... again, Samus would decimate Black Scorpion with one well aimed Charge beam, Fox McCloud would be destroyed by Scirroco because I've never played Starfox and don't like the look of it and Mario would just eat a mushroom and stomp Recluse like the spider he is.

Cloud Strife Vs Link Vs Dante

[Lost_samurai_EU]

Dante has endured a hell of a lot of punishment, but with a devil father and human mother. Devil offspring = evil in most heroes eyes, Link and Cloud being two of them so they would automatically team up against him.
Link uses the Ocarina of Time to go back a few days and plant a sufficient supply of items to help him out.
back in the present he whips out his bow and fires a light arrow straight at Dante who cathes it in mid air and snaps it in two.
Cloud leaps in with his sword from advent children and starts swinging, dante parrys with his own sword and leaps up a building with cloud after him, link is stranded as he searches for a ladder.
Dante whips out his guns, ebony and ivory and starts firing at cloud who blocks with his sword as he edges towards dante. As dnate draws the force edge cloud fires of an ice 3 towards him and dante leaps out of the way. gasping for air he looks up to notice a bomb right in front of him, he jumps backwards and is slashed in the back by link with the master sword. As dante recoils back he see link with a smug grin on his face tossing a hookshot in his other hand. he cathes it and fires it at dante, it penetrates his stomach and he is pulled towards link, as he tries to pull back he notices cloud rushing towards him, he jumps foward towards link and dodges cloud as he crashes headfirst into the unsuspecting hyrulian. Ripping the hookshot out of him he grabs a jar of blue liquid from links belt and downs it, restoring him to full strength. snagging links boomerang he hurls it at cloud who leaps casually over it, before somersaulting backwards as dante tries to hit him with the force edge. he redies himself and is knocked over as the boomerang returns and looks up to see a gun at his head. click, no more ammo as dante quickly redraws the force edge before being tackled by lnik with his pegasus boots. Cloud sees his chance and starts twirling the blade and activates his limit break. omnislash, both dante and link were caught in the blows and both are knocked of the building towards the ground.
Cloud leaps after them and inspects their silent bodies, no movement, he sheathes the sword and looks up at the rain falling around him. "listen, silence, ive won" cloud says to himself.
Links eyes open as the fairy escapes its bottle and heals him, ..listen..listen.LISTEN! Memories rush into links ehad of that word and he goes berserk, he unsheathes the master sword and charges at cloud, unleashing his ultimate move *courtesy of the SSB brawl trailer* Cloud is trapped in the power of the triforce as Link slices him to pieces. Cloud falls to the floor, bleeding all over as link walks away, the hero of time has many mroe battles to fight.

Link vs Navi vs Ganon vs Dark Link

[Standoff]

[ QUOTE ]
Link vs Navi vs Ganon vs Dark Link

[/ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Cloud Strife Vs Link Vs Dante

[/ QUOTE ]
I have no idea at all who any of these people are.

Just had to share that with you. :)

[Acenra]

Link takes on dark Link and they are evenly matched. meanwhile, Navi's tactics of continuasly shouting "Hey" and "Listen" to annoy Gannon works. The great beast topples and staggers as insanity kicks in then falls back. Navi then suddenly warns Link out of force of habbit, who ducks out the way in time to allow Gannon to crush dark link and be impaled on the doppleganger's sword, killing two birds with one stone. Link is now in battle with Navi, who is immune to the annoyance technique, leaving Navi breathless after several hours then falling to the floor unconcious

Winner: LINK!!!

next time:

Zasalemel (Soul Calibur 3 scythe guy) vs. Statesman armed with a twig

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
Link takes on dark Link and they are evenly matched. meanwhile, Navi's tactics of continuasly shouting "Hey" and "Listen" to annoy Gannon works. The great beast topples and staggers as insanity kicks in then falls back. Navi then suddenly warns Link out of force of habbit, who ducks out the way in time to allow Gannon to crush dark link and be impaled on the doppleganger's sword, killing two birds with one stone. Link is now in battle with Navi, who is immune to the annoyance technique, leaving Navi breathless after several hours then falling to the floor unconcious

Winner: LINK!!!

next time:

Zasalemel (Soul Calibur 3 scythe guy) vs. Statesman armed with a twig

[/ QUOTE ]

Statesman - it's obviously the nerf twig :)

Garret vs Sam Fisher

[bushbaby]

That would be Garrett...he can become nearly invisible, see round corners and doesn't carry three bright green lights on his forehead all the time.. I mean how blind must you be to miss those!

hhmmmm....

Anita Blake Vs Buffy

[Slazenger]

Clyde (any which way but loose) or cheetah (Tarzan)
Take into effect that clyde has been nerfed, his right turn meneuver has been seriously hampered since ED.

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
That would be Garrett...he can become nearly invisible, see round corners and doesn't carry three bright green lights on his forehead all the time.. I mean how blind must you be to miss those!

hhmmmm....

Anita Blake Vs Buffy

[/ QUOTE ]

Mmmmh.... well that would depend on the "I've slept with more vampires quotient". So Anita would get win (also with the whole Lycan thing).... but, I have an inherent love of all things Joss, so Buffy wins by default. Huzzah!

Ok, next up, the old green one, versus the hyper blue one

Yoda vs. Stitch (from the Disney flick)

[Lost_samurai_EU]

yoda activates his light saber and does a bit of showing off to the crowd as Stich in his spacesuit draws a couple of blasters. *cue cliched seqeunce invovling shots being reflected by yodas saber skillz*. stitch rips up part of the nearby floor and hurls it at yodas head like an oversized shotputt, Yoda leaps out of the way and uses the force to smash stitch back against a wall.
Stitch esponds with some appropriate alien words before doing the hula, yoda is confused by this and does not know what to make of his opponent dancing when he is nearly defeated. " Come, your end has mutant" Yoda rushes towards stich with the lightsaber and raises it to strike him. But a spaceship comes crashing through the ceiling in response to the homing signal stitch had activated while dancing which lands on yoda, crushing him.
Stitch wins

Ebaum vs Rich Lowtax Kyanka vs A Superlawyer

[Myopic Aardvark]

It would have to be the superlawyer - have you see how quickly Frostfire gets released in Paragon City?

Ok battle of the titans here - Stephen King vs. Stephen Hawking - fight must be set in Maine and involve quantum physics.

[columbo]

[ QUOTE ]

Columbo, after many years of cigar chomping, isn't much use and scratches his rugged chin before deciding he needs another coffee, which gives him a fatal heart attack. Oops!

[/ QUOTE ]

Hey! The cigars and coffee keep me awake, it was ED that finished me....

[Frazzle_d]

[ QUOTE ]
Link would obliterate Mako with the Master sword, Kirby would boil Ghost Widow til she died... again, Samus would decimate Black Scorpion with one well aimed Charge beam, Fox McCloud would be destroyed by Scirroco because I've never played Starfox and don't like the look of it and Mario would just eat a mushroom and stomp Recluse like the spider he is.

Cloud Strife Vs Link Vs Dante

[/ QUOTE ]

You don't like Starfox? =(

Link retires due to 'I ain't fighting anymore damned maniacs for SFA gratitude or dosh so f off' moment, leaving Cloud Strife and Dante. Strife is can't actually lift his weapon so Dante comes along and consumes everything in hellfire.

Meta-Ridley vs. Positron, CoH's own Samus (come on you know he wants to be a girl really, as opposed to a green plume of choking radiation :))

LOL - I missed an entire page thus making this post look a bit daft. Damn.

[PRAF68_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
It would have to be the superlawyer - have you see how quickly Frostfire gets released in Paragon City?

Ok battle of the titans here - Stephen King vs. Stephen Hawking - fight must be set in Maine and involve quantum physics.

[/ QUOTE ]

Hawking trundles down a deserted street in Maine, past white picket fences, when a clown reaches out of a drain and grabs his wheelchair, slowly draging him towards the stormdrain.

Hawking responds by (ever so slowly) explaining multiple world theory to the killer clown, who quickly dies of boredom.

Hawkings wheelchiar then develops a malevolent life of it's own, but dies when King, watching through an upstairs window of one of the houses, is run over by a truck emerging from a parallel dimension into his bedroom.

But King is not dead! The Earth splits open and an army of mutant zombies emergies.

Hawking quickly creates the Daleks, who exterminate the zombies and King. They then turn on thier creator.

Result: A draw.

[Coin]

[ QUOTE ]
[Hawking quickly creates the Daleks

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh man that is so nasty, but gods help me, I didn't half laugh! That probably says something really bad about me now :eek:

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
It would have to be the superlawyer - have you see how quickly Frostfire gets released in Paragon City?

Ok battle of the titans here - Stephen King vs. Stephen Hawking - fight must be set in Maine and involve quantum physics.

[/ QUOTE ]

Hawking trundles down a deserted street in Maine, past white picket fences, when a clown reaches out of a drain and grabs his wheelchair, slowly draging him towards the stormdrain.

Hawking responds by (ever so slowly) explaining multiple world theory to the killer clown, who quickly dies of boredom.

Hawkings wheelchiar then develops a malevolent life of it's own, but dies when King, watching through an upstairs window of one of the houses, is run over by a truck emerging from a parallel dimension into his bedroom.

But King is not dead! The Earth splits open and an army of mutant zombies emergies.

Hawking quickly creates the Daleks, who exterminate the zombies and King. They then turn on thier creator.

Result: A draw.

[/ QUOTE ]

Nicely done. But what about the next fight?

[Mordranis]

Solid Snake vs Samus Aran (Samus ftw!). If you haven't noticed I'm a Nintendo fan, and Frazzle it's not that I don't like Starfox having never played it, but I don't feel any urge to either. :p

[Duckdee]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[Hawking quickly creates the Daleks

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh man that is so nasty, but gods help me, I didn't half laugh! That probably says something really bad about me now :eek:

[/ QUOTE ]
I did too, but I can get away with it ;)

[Haidou]

[ QUOTE ]
Solid Snake vs Samus Aran (Samus ftw!). If you haven't noticed I'm a Nintendo fan, and Frazzle it's not that I don't like Starfox having never played it, but I don't feel any urge to either. :p

[/ QUOTE ]
Samus destroys the wannabe commando.

Now here's a tough one.
&gt; Ryu Hayabusa versus the Master Chief

[Coin]

[ QUOTE ]
Ryu Hayabusa versus the Master Chief

[/ QUOTE ]

Ryu starts off with a blistering attack, but is immediately smacked down with the Wok Of Doom by the Master Chef who then..........ermm, hang on, I think I misread that....

[KeeperOfSorrows]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Ryu Hayabusa versus the Master Chief

[/ QUOTE ]

Ryu starts off with a blistering attack, but is immediately smacked down with the Wok Of Doom by the Master Chef who then..........ermm, hang on, I think I misread that....

[/ QUOTE ]

Thank you for lightening the (ridiculously early) start of a very miserable looking day :)

[DreamWeaver]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

Ryu starts off with a blistering attack, but is immediately smacked down with the Wok Of Doom by the Master Chef who then..........ermm, hang on, I think I misread that....

[/ QUOTE ]

Thank you for lightening the (ridiculously early) start of a very miserable looking day :)

[/ QUOTE ]

Dö, di dishkie döo, däh dee, dee dishkie döo, dee bå de dö ki däh dö BÅNG BÅNG BÅNG!

Nöo yöu puts da Cövenaäantie in di puddie...[/i]

Classy, Coin, classy.

Next match: live from the infernal city of Dis, it's the All-Hell Super Smackdown!

Ghost Rider vs Spawn

[PRAF68_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Nicely done. But what about the next fight?

[/ QUOTE ]

Sorry, forgot, how about The Cybermen vs The Borg?

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Nicely done. But what about the next fight?

[/ QUOTE ]

Sorry, forgot, how about The Cybermen vs The Borg?

[/ QUOTE ]

Ahhhh tooo many choices - so how about

The Cybermen vs The Borg vs Ghost Rider vs Spawn.

[Mordranis]

The Borg assimilate all of them, the end :p.

Tony Blair Vs Peter Griffin

[Lost_samurai_EU]

peter griffin, in his short reign as president of petoria he accomplished much more than blair ever will for us.

kirby vs godzilla vs king kong vs atlases praetorian counterpart from the past

[Wes01]

Since King Kong and Godzilla are old friends they'll tag and defeat Kirby and Atlas preto who're uneasy with teamplay then they'll do a Godzilla versus King Kong remka.

The real winner would be Peter Jackson.

An hard one Franklin Richards (subconsciouly omniscient and omnipotent and consciously powerless) versus ..... the all-time X-men alliance.

[Triassic]

Well if you have see the last stand you will know that there is one x-men who can win ***spoiler dark phoenix*** all alone...So there is no need to make an alliance of X-men to kill a good...He alone can do anything...This is one of the main reasons why i'm annoyed with this film...

[Silver_Weasel]

I bring Leech in...all lose ;)

Jamie Oliver vs. Tony Blair in a Food Fight?

[Wes01]

[/color]<blockquote><font class="small">En réponse à:[/color]<hr />
***spoiler dark phoenix***

[/ QUOTE ]

You don't seem to understand that FR subconciously rule reality soo dark phoenix exist only because he subconciouly accpt it.

[Frazzle_d]

NOOOOO! No alternate discussions, you'll doom us all when my alternate self; a creature of unfathomed strength, speed and intelligence, not to mention unrivalled wit, will come and defeat us all with his mutant power of washing powder.

[Acenra]

[ QUOTE ]
I bring Leech in...all lose ;)

Jamie Oliver vs. Tony Blair in a Food Fight?

[/ QUOTE ]

Jamie oliver would just do what we do, grab a wok and smash blair in the face.

next time:

Pluto (the planet) VS. A Giant tennis ball!

[Chiefette]

[ QUOTE ]


Jamie oliver would just do what we do, grab a wok and smash blair in the face.

next time:

Pluto (the planet) VS. A Giant tennis ball!

[/ QUOTE ]
Pluto is made of non-tennis-ball material some very tough rock so would be able to resist any giant tennis ball (GTB) attacks..
so also because it orbits quite slowly and is so far from the sun. If the GTB missed any attacks it'd drift off into outer space
RING OUT! WIN FOR PLUTO :)
Now here's one then on a silly note
The Punisher
versus
Neptune (the planet)

[Frazzle_d]

Fact; Neptune has an atmospshere of mostly methane. Very smelly in other words.

Punisher finds this inexcusable, a terrible blight that must be removed.

Methane is flammable though. Punisher ignites the atmosphere and Neptune wins, since there's more of that left afterwards than there is of Punisher.

Next round! Meta-Ridley vs. Infernal.

[Chiefette]

Infernal wins because he takes out his pocket portal that spawns tons-and-tons of behemoths and swarms de Meta-Ridley
Meta-Ridley is burninated very slowly..but surely, since the behemoths keep on coming

Now then: (final punisher one i promise XD)
The Punisher
Versus:
Papa Smurf

[Acenra]

there was a TV show that did exstensive research into which animal would win in a fight, and I found a game which is based on it

Linky (http://dsc.discovery.com/convergence/animalfaceoff/game/play.html)

[Chiefette]

Ooh i love that show !:D with the CGI animals...and the action..wasnt there someone famous like David Attenborough narrating it or am i making the show sound far better than it is? :D
Chief

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
The Punisher
Versus:
Papa Smurf

[/ QUOTE ]

Papa Smurf. The Punisher wouldn't attack Papa Smurf, since he's done nothing wrong. So, that leaves Papa Smurf free to get in a sneak attack, pulling out a switchblade and cutting Punisher's achilles tendons. Then, when Punisher is unable to move, Smurf stabs him in both eyes, before offering him up for an unholy sacrifice to his Dark Master.

...No more beer before forums. It isn't good for me.

Red Dwarf (the ship) versus Red Dwarf (the celestial body)

[Silver_Weasel]

Onboard Starbug

Rimmer: And then I threw a 6! Total Domination of Ukraine!
Lister: Someone get me a giant sized aspirin.
Kryten: Why Mister Lister Sir? Have you got a headache?
Lister: No, I'm just gonna brain Rimmer if he doesn't shut the smeg up.
Cat: Shut up guys, I've got something large coming up on my nose.
Kryten: So acne treatment for the Cat as well...
Cat: No, Lav-Droid, I got something big, like bigger than Rimmer's nostrils.
Lister: Punch it up Cat
Rimmer: *mumbling* Napoleon was known for his nostrils.
Kryten: Might I suggest Sir that that Napoleon was also known for his fingers and midnight excursions of his nasal capacity.
Lister: What the SMEG is that thing?
Rimmer: Well, it looks like something from the Hertzsprung-Russell diagram.
All turn and look at Rimmer
Rimmer: What? I could know that!
Lister: Ok then Mister 'I Spy book of Stars', what exactly is it?
Rimmer : squints Looks like a White Dwarf.
Lister: Apart from the fact it's red.
Rimmer: Ok, apart from the fact it's red it could be a White Dwarf.
Lister: So it's a Pink Dwarf?
Cat: Pink? That's no colour for a dwarf, or a star; unless it's got a nice Purple Moon around it.
Lister: Calm down Cat, it's just a Red Dwarf.
Cat: It is? Cool! Full Speed ahead then!
ALL: NO!!!
Kryten: It's not THE Red Dwarf, it is A Red Dwarf.
Cat: So it's A) The Red Dwarf? What's the other choice?
Kryten: No sir, I don't think you understand. Perhaps this will explain it better. *brains the Cat*
Cat: Whoa.....lots of stars...cool.
Cat Collapses
Rimmer: Nice going, you mechanical moron. Now we don't have a pilot!
Kryten: I'm sorry sir, but there's not enough room to explain it to the Cat.
Rimmer: Room? What are you talking about you Iron-o-matic?
Kryten: As I tried to explain Sir, this Red Dwarf has a giant gravitational pull which is actually crushing time and space and could go Nova at any time.
Rimmer: I see. I see. I see. Do you think it would accept our surrender?
Lister: Listen guys, I've figured this out. It's just a big star, isn't it? So all it actually wants is it's own TV show.
Rimmer: Whilst it's very kind of you to share your complete trip into loonydom, I think our imminent death is SOMEWHAT more important.
Cat: Hold on ladies, there's so much more of my wardrobes to see...
Rimmer: Wonderful, a brainless pilot, a deranged co-pilot and a toilet pilot. If you want me, I'll be making my will out to the Aliens.
Rimmer Leaves
Lister: Ok, now he's gone, I can explain my real plan. All we have to do is give it heartburn then it burps out all the excess time and room and gives us Star-Bug.
Kryten: I think I see Sir, and whilst I think giving up your entire curry storage is an admirable idea, can I just re-emphasise Mister Rimmer's idea that you've gone completely off your rocker?
Lister: Hold on a moment, I remember reading that Red Dwarfs can't do the whole helium fusion thing, so they can't become Red Giants?
Kryten: I'm sorry sir, first you want to give it curries, and then you want me to accept you've been reading? I think that aspirin is long overdue.
Lister: Listen, if I can find some Helium, will you help me?
Kryten: Of course sir.
Lister: Cat, wake up, I need you to help me get something out of Rimmer's quarters.
Cat: *woozy* Seven? But Marilyn, why so many?
Lister: Just get a move on...

------------------------------------------
[cut to a very small starbug : Cat and Lister are sitting in the pilot seats pressed against the wall]

Cat: So let me get this straight, you're giving it a squeaky voice?
Lister: Hey, it's gonna work! You ready there Kryten?
Voice from underneath Lister: Ready sir. Has anyone seen Mister Rimmer?
Cat: He said something about looking for Rachel for one last goodbye...
Lister: Well, goodbye Rachel!

We look out of the window for a bit and then a huge blow up doll sails off towards the Red Dwarf

Cat: Easy does it, Easy does it....
Kryten: May I just say sir that this scene has rated a score of 1567.43 on my Innuendo Scale which only registers 9.5 on Carry On Right Up To The Hilt.
Lister: It's in position. Bazookoid it!

Cat fires and two blue streaks slam into the doll, detonating it and throwing Starbug free

A new slightly bigger Starbug with Lister on Kryten's shoulders

Kryten: Now reading 1600.55 Sir.
Rimmer enters
Rimmer: Well it looks like I won't be needing Rachel after all, it seems you guys actually managed it. I must admit I thought you were all loopier than a loopy thing but you did....manage...
His voice trails off as a rubber foot balloon floats past the window

Fade to Music

Next up : I7 vs. I6

[KeeperOfSorrows]

[ QUOTE ]
Onboard Starbug

Rimmer: And then I threw a 6! Total Domination of Ukraine!
Lister: Someone get me a giant sized aspirin.
Kryten: Why Mister Lister Sir? Have you got a headache?
Lister: No, I'm just gonna brain Rimmer if he doesn't shut the smeg up.
Cat: Shut up guys, I've got something large coming up on my nose.
Kryten: So acne treatment for the Cat as well...
Cat: No, Lav-Droid, I got something big, like bigger than Rimmer's nostrils.
Lister: Punch it up Cat
Rimmer: *mumbling* Napoleon was known for his nostrils.
Kryten: Might I suggest Sir that that Napoleon was also known for his fingers and midnight excursions of his nasal capacity.
Lister: What the SMEG is that thing?
Rimmer: Well, it looks like something from the Hertzsprung-Russell diagram.
All turn and look at Rimmer
Rimmer: What? I could know that!
Lister: Ok then Mister 'I Spy book of Stars', what exactly is it?
Rimmer : squints Looks like a White Dwarf.
Lister: Apart from the fact it's red.
Rimmer: Ok, apart from the fact it's red it could be a White Dwarf.
Lister: So it's a Pink Dwarf?
Cat: Pink? That's no colour for a dwarf, or a star; unless it's got a nice Purple Moon around it.
Lister: Calm down Cat, it's just a Red Dwarf.
Cat: It is? Cool! Full Speed ahead then!
ALL: NO!!!
Kryten: It's not THE Red Dwarf, it is A Red Dwarf.
Cat: So it's A) The Red Dwarf? What's the other choice?
Kryten: No sir, I don't think you understand. Perhaps this will explain it better. *brains the Cat*
Cat: Whoa.....lots of stars...cool.
Cat Collapses
Rimmer: Nice going, you mechanical moron. Now we don't have a pilot!
Kryten: I'm sorry sir, but there's not enough room to explain it to the Cat.
Rimmer: Room? What are you talking about you Iron-o-matic?
Kryten: As I tried to explain Sir, this Red Dwarf has a giant gravitational pull which is actually crushing time and space and could go Nova at any time.
Rimmer: I see. I see. I see. Do you think it would accept our surrender?
Lister: Listen guys, I've figured this out. It's just a big star, isn't it? So all it actually wants is it's own TV show.
Rimmer: Whilst it's very kind of you to share your complete trip into loonydom, I think our imminent death is SOMEWHAT more important.
Cat: Hold on ladies, there's so much more of my wardrobes to see...
Rimmer: Wonderful, a brainless pilot, a deranged co-pilot and a toilet pilot. If you want me, I'll be making my will out to the Aliens.
Rimmer Leaves
Lister: Ok, now he's gone, I can explain my real plan. All we have to do is give it heartburn then it burps out all the excess time and room and gives us Star-Bug.
Kryten: I think I see Sir, and whilst I think giving up your entire curry storage is an admirable idea, can I just re-emphasise Mister Rimmer's idea that you've gone completely off your rocker?
Lister: Hold on a moment, I remember reading that Red Dwarfs can't do the whole helium fusion thing, so they can't become Red Giants?
Kryten: I'm sorry sir, first you want to give it curries, and then you want me to accept you've been reading? I think that aspirin is long overdue.
Lister: Listen, if I can find some Helium, will you help me?
Kryten: Of course sir.
Lister: Cat, wake up, I need you to help me get something out of Rimmer's quarters.
Cat: *woozy* Seven? But Marilyn, why so many?
Lister: Just get a move on...

------------------------------------------
[cut to a very small starbug : Cat and Lister are sitting in the pilot seats pressed against the wall]

Cat: So let me get this straight, you're giving it a squeaky voice?
Lister: Hey, it's gonna work! You ready there Kryten?
Voice from underneath Lister: Ready sir. Has anyone seen Mister Rimmer?
Cat: He said something about looking for Rachel for one last goodbye...
Lister: Well, goodbye Rachel!

We look out of the window for a bit and then a huge blow up doll sails off towards the Red Dwarf

Cat: Easy does it, Easy does it....
Kryten: May I just say sir that this scene has rated a score of 1567.43 on my Innuendo Scale which only registers 9.5 on Carry On Right Up To The Hilt.
Lister: It's in position. Bazookoid it!

Cat fires and two blue streaks slam into the doll, detonating it and throwing Starbug free

A new slightly bigger Starbug with Lister on Kryten's shoulders

Kryten: Now reading 1600.55 Sir.
Rimmer enters
Rimmer: Well it looks like I won't be needing Rachel after all, it seems you guys actually managed it. I must admit I thought you were all loopier than a loopy thing but you did....manage...
His voice trails off as a rubber foot balloon floats past the window

Fade to Music

Next up : I7 vs. I6

[/ QUOTE ]

*Gives a prolonged and intricate Rimmer-salute to Weasel*

Although I now have a sneaking suspicion you may in fact be Rob Grant and/or Doug Naylor... :)

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]


*Gives a prolonged and intricate Rimmer-salute to Weasel*

Although I now have a sneaking suspicion you may in fact be Rob Grant and/or Doug Naylor... :)

[/ QUOTE ]

Compliment filed and appreciated, SAH! :D

[bushbaby]

ok....I7 vs. I6

I7 obviously wins as it is a higher number therfore it must be a superior product (anyone else read Dilbert?) :D

next one: Hannibal Lecter Vs Riddick

[Silver_Weasel]

Riddick walks in on Hannibal's safe house. Hannibal's hand sits in the middle of the table, holding the salt &amp; pepper.

So my dear fellow, what may a humble old man do for you?
So you're the infamous cannibal? Look more like a cannonball to me!
I see your sense of humour is only matched by your box-office receipts, my dear Mr. Riddick
Hell, I killed more people than you ever did.
Indeed you did, indeed you did. But it is not for me to divulge on such matters when we can eat together and perhaps share some....ssssssss...memories?
You think I'm gonna just sit and eat with you? What's to stop me blowing your ****ing brains out now, freak?
Why nothing, but you wouldn't condemn a dying man not to eat his last dish would you?
*Hannibal sits down*
You're dying?
*Riddick sits down*
That is yet to be seen, but Starling if you would carve for us.
What? *SHLUCK* AAAAAAAAA *SHLACK* YOU [censored] MOTHER *SHLOCK*
Join us to eat Sissster, our dying man is growing cold.

Hannibal wins :)

Next up : Jelly Babies vs Liquorice Alsorts vs Wine Gums

[Myopic Aardvark]

Bertie, armed only with a liquorice torpedo leans around the corner. In his sights are the green jelly baby and the red jelly baby.

Bertie moves forward, only to trip over the yellow wine gum, who has passed out on the floor. The two jelly babies turn around and start to throw powdered sugar at Bertie, who's hat falls off and he gets all aflustered.

Suddenly, a set of giant fingers, attached to a sibilant sounding voice reach in and grab all the sweets, accompanied with the phrase: "Would you like a jelly baby?"

Winner: The Fourth Doctor!

Next up: The First Doctor vs The Second Doctor vs The Third Doctor vs the Fourth Doctor vs The Fifth Doctor vs The Sixth Doctor vs The Seventh Doctor vs The Eighth Doctor vs The Ninth Doctor vs The Tenth Doctor vs The Valeyard vs The Master.

:)

[Myopic Aardvark]

Just a quick aside, not to take away from the massive Doctor Rumble above.

Issue 6 AV vs Issue 7 AV (heh heh)

[Coin]

[ QUOTE ]
BNext up: The First Doctor vs The Second Doctor vs The Third Doctor vs the Fourth Doctor vs The Fifth Doctor vs The Sixth Doctor vs The Seventh Doctor vs The Eighth Doctor vs The Ninth Doctor vs The Tenth Doctor vs The Valeyard vs The Master.

:)

[/ QUOTE ]

Coughcough (http://uk.boards.cityofheroes.com/showflat.php?Cat=&amp;Board=ComicsUK&amp;Number=350235&amp;For um=f85&amp;Words=Doctor&amp;Searchpage=0&amp;Limit=25&amp;Main=327 542&amp;Search=true&amp;where=bodysub&amp;Name=16688&amp;daterange =1&amp;newerval=1&amp;newertype=y&amp;olderval=&amp;oldertype=&amp;bod yprev=#Post350235)

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]
Just a quick aside, not to take away from the massive Doctor Rumble above.

Issue 6 AV vs Issue 7 AV (heh heh)

[/ QUOTE ]

Neutron and Black Swan pwn all the I7's. The others keep fighting until the server crashes.

Red vs. Black?

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Red vs. Black?

[/ QUOTE ]

They're both on FG's costume, so they BOTH win!

Red versus Blue?

[Lost_samurai_EU]

http://rvb.roosterteeth.com/home.php
sarge kills grif, tex kills simons, tucker and sarge before being killed by doughnut, church runs doughtnut over with a tank, blues win. kaboose was busy drinking washing detergeant.
i take this kind of thing to seriously

FGs cossie vs wolverines cossie vs losts cossie vs a mayhem mish vs andy the bomb

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]

FGs cossie vs wolverines cossie vs losts cossie vs a mayhem mish vs andy the bomb

[/ QUOTE ]

ICON :)

Jeff Minter vs Rob Hubbard vs Sir Clive Sinclair vs Alan Sugar?

[Sayia]

Not sure if this has been done before but who would win in a fight.......


Jack (Richard Dean "McGuyver" Anderson) O'niell Vs. Jack (Kurt "Snake Plisken" Russle)O'niell.

And.......


Dr Daniel ( Micheal" No idea what else he is in" Shanks) Jackson Vs. Dr Daniel (James " No idea aswell" Spader) Jackson


For the O'niell one i think that Richard Dean Anderson would win simply because he is McGuyver , and for the Dr Jackson one probably Micheal Shank simply because he turned ancienct *cough Khielden cough* . What do other people think?

[Myopic Aardvark]

Erm, you're not supposed to answer your own fight. You're supposed to answer the one in the post above.

[Sayia]

[ QUOTE ]
Erm, you're not supposed to answer your own fight. You're supposed to answer the one in the post above.

[/ QUOTE ]

My sincerist appologies i dont use this thread all to often i assure you it will not happen again.

[Limbo_EU]

Ok not sure if saiya used up his fight. if he did ignore this one. If this has been done before then also ignore this

Idiot Hero (and sidekick) rumble time

The Tick and Arthur vs. Earthworm Jim and Peter Puppy

appearances of heroes/villains from both sides is also acceptable :)

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Erm, you're not supposed to answer your own fight. You're supposed to answer the one in the post above.

[/ QUOTE ]

My sincerist appologies i dont use this thread all to often i assure you it will not happen again.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not really the biggest breech of etiquette :) No harm done.

Premise of the Thread

Name a Match

Next person gives their view of what happens and they name a match for the next person :) Have a read back.

[Myopic Aardvark]

Sorry Saiya, didn't mean to come across so heavy handed. I blame the hot weather.

[Sayia]

[ QUOTE ]
Sorry Saiya, didn't mean to come across so heavy handed. I blame the hot weather.

[/ QUOTE ]

No probs matey *shakes hand*, i blame the hot weather too and my hay fever. :cool:

[C0rp0ral_Punish]

Who would win i a contest of speed Superman of The Flash ??

[Frazzle_d]

[ QUOTE ]
Who would win i a contest of speed Superman of The Flash ??

[/ QUOTE ]

Interesting this actually. Supposedly, Superman is capable of speeds at insane levels, possibly equal to that of the Flash, although anytime I've seen the Justice League cartoon, Superman never uses this power.

&gt;&gt;SPOLIER&lt;&lt;
There was one episode where the Flash and 'evil' Superman ended up having a fight, where Flash was merely trying to stall untill his own Justice League support arrived. He caught Superman off guard with superior reflexes and bursts of speed a couple of times but eventually got cornered and was about to be pummeled.

I think the Flash is unique in the sense his body movement, reflexes, metabolism and the way he does on ground gives him an edge over the way he uses his speed than Superman, who uses it only during flight really.

I'd believe a fight between the two would be a draw, since neither would really tire out.

I cba coming up with another match up, sorry :)

[Silver_Weasel]

Homer (Greek Poet) vs. Homer (Simpson)?

[C0rp0ral_Punish]

Homer Simpson hands down we all know he fights dirty when he can, but the other Homer may leed Homer Simpson into thinking there is no need for voilance and thus there would be no winner :confused:

What about Venom V.s Carnage

[Myopic Aardvark]

Carnage would win, because Venom always wusses out at the last minute.

Eddie "The Eagle" Edwards vs. Evil Knievel.

[KeeperOfSorrows]

The outcome of the event is a fogone conclusion: Eddie always comes last! However, his loss of yet another event hikes "The Eagles" popularity even further. But they both declared bankruptcy so...

Results
Event winner: Evil
Sponsorship winner: Eddie
Actual winner: The Taxman!

Up next:
Montgomery Scott (Star Trek: TOS)
vs
Geordi LaForge (Star Trek: TNG)
vs
Belana Torres (Star Trek: Voyager)
vs
Kayleigh (Firefly/Serenity)

...in a Scrapheap Challenge style event.

[Myopic Aardvark]

Meh. No contest

These Starfleet types with their super duper hi tech equipment wouldn't know what to do in a scrapyard. Perhaps if you'd thrown Miles O'Brien in there, there would be a challenge to Kaylee, but no.

Whilst the three starfleet officers are busy talking about Duotronic alignment fields and looking for wibbly blue things to save the day, Kaylee has already declared the entire scrapyard "Shiny", found all the bits she needs (including a funny shaped object that makes an appearance a lot in Firefly), she's built a working ambulance and it's well gone.

Kaylee wins!

Coming up next (along the same lines)

Battle of the security chiefs: Kirk (his chief redshirt having tied in a tragic accident with an alien traffic cone sucking his fat out), Worf, Odo, Tuvok, Garibaldi (B5) and Jayne.

Let's have a good (unclean) fight ;)

[EasyTiger]

Kirk is too busy chatting up Jayne to even bother fighting,

Whilst Odo is regenerating in his bucket Garibaldi sneaks in a puts a lid over it - being good Starfleet folk Worf and Tuvok are honour bound to assist him but are confused by a plot device only having one syllable (Lid)

Cut to Garibaldi nicking the Defiant and sloping off to beat up some telepaths!!

Easy Garibaldi wins.

Who would win in a fight between Ghandi and Mother Theresa?

[Myopic Aardvark]

Erm.... why would kirk be chatting up Jayne? It would be a vast change for our Captain to be chatting up a guy. (I know, he's been in denial for years... yada yada yada)

[EasyTiger]

Never heard of Jayne so I took a guess - 50/50 - I blame those telepath's Garibaldi has gone to beat up

[Standoff]

[ QUOTE ]
Who would win in a fight between Ghandi and Mother Theresa?

[/ QUOTE ]
Easy win for the Mother; Ghandi's a declared pacifist and she isn't, and while she may be a bit frail to take the win personally she does have the Vatican Albino Monk Squad to call on.

Next up: Asterix the Gaul vs Popeye

[KeeperOfSorrows]

Popeye is far too reliant on spinach to solve all his problems (very few, if any, episodes of Popeye where he doesn't fall back on his vegetable crutch at some point), whereas Asterix relies on the "magic potion" far less. Result: a win for Asterix, being less hampered by an addiction.

Next up, spurred on by Coin's recent "mis-reading" of a past match:

The Iron Man
vs
The Iron Giant
vs
The Iron Chef

Each armed with their choice of: A iron bar, a three-iron golf club, a steam iron, or an ion-proton accelerator laser railgun...

[Lost_samurai_EU]

to quote someone else, the winner would be galactus.

seriously though i gotta go with the iron chef armed with an ion-proton accelerator laser railgun. hes spent years on tv doing his best and not getting the same credit, thus being driven mad and going on a rampagfe with the gun. the iron giant cant fight back without crushing to many innocents so retires and iron man is blissfully unaware of this as he battles some other mroe significant threat, and in hero style overestimates himself and loses.

Master_zaprobo vs Golden crusader vs Fire_guardian vs Jumanjiation vs Nina cat

all in a super smash bros melee style free for all. all powers, items, insps go.
with bridger refereeing the match

[Silver_Weasel]

Bridger wins. Coz he can :)

Gremlins vs. Critters?

[Myopic Aardvark]

Gremlins win - but only because Gizmo is so darn cute. Besides Leif Roar's avatar would never forgive me if they didn't win ;)

Next round - A silver picture frame versus a toxicly mutated sewer iguanadon.

[Sayia]

Bahhh Gremlins hate them they broke my telly.............long story

and a toxicly mutated sewer iguanadon would win there just too darn cool them.

Ok...

who would win in a fight

Superman Vs. The Hulk

Bearing in mind that Supes is indestructable and the hulk gets stronger the more he gets hit/angry

[Doc_Shango]

Unless Superman plays it dumb and just stands around for a I hit you, you hit me slug fest then Superman's gotta win. He's of roughly the same strength level but is as fast as the Flash. The Hulk's swings aren't gonna connect so the Hulks gotta fall eventually due to the sheer number of hit's he's getting.... unless the Hulks green skin is actually caused by kryptonite....or the fight takes place under ground away from the suns light....then it might be a Hulk win.... but still the boy in blue wins.
next
Howard the Duck Vs Iron Fist (Quack Fu!!! )

[Sayia]

Howard the duck obvioulsy he is part jedi...

Who would win......

Green Lantern Vs Psylock

[Silver_Weasel]

Psylocke puts on her yellow ninja outfit and beats the living tar out of Green Lantern due to DC having a REALLY stupid idea of weaknesses (Wonder Woman can't untie herself if tied up by a man using toilet paper?)

Batman and Robin vs. Green Hornet and Kato?

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Psylocke puts on her yellow ninja outfit and beats the living tar out of Green Lantern due to DC having a REALLY stupid idea of weaknesses (Wonder Woman can't untie herself if tied up by a man using toilet paper?)

Batman and Robin vs. Green Hornet and Kato?

[/ QUOTE ]

This one's easy. It's a stalemate, due to Adam West and Burt Ward saying that -they- should win, and Whatsisname and Bruce Lee saying -they- should win.

Daffy Duck versus Darkwing Duck

[C0rp0ral_Punish]

Darkwing Duck coz he is much cooler than Daffy Duck.

What about The Freedom Phalanx V.s The Justice League Of America

[EasyTiger]

Daffy Duck vs Darkwing Duck fight cancelled as Kato and the Green Hornet make them both into a lovely Crispy duck dish - Hoi Sin sauce FTW!!

Who would win between Bill S Preston and Theodore Logan vs Marty Mcfly and Doc Emmit Brown?

[Stasisesque]

By harnessing the power of the intarwebs, Bill and Ted summon Spock, The Rock, Doc Oc and Hulk Hogan to aid them in battle.

Unfortunately, The Doc falls victim to the rhyming power of song, and is forced to join Bill and Ted's team.

This leaves Marty alone, but not for long! The DeLorean (if you're gonna build a time machine, do it with style) has recently been repaired, and within a matter of seconds Marty had managed to grab all three versions of himself, including some of the alternate versions; this gives him the edge.

Unfortunately, The Doc notices this, and starts blathering on about interacting with time and ruining the time/space continuum - and why does Einstein always recognise Marty?

Bill and Ted have been distracted the whole time by the extra recruits, and are desperately trying to get them to join the band.

In short, the sequels are incredibly confusing, and the audience are outraged at the fact they can't understand what the hell is going on. Hence, there's an uprising. Fans of both films rise up from the audience and slaughter the cast, directors and scriptwriters.

The moral of this story: Just because the lead characters are cute, that doesn't give you the right to mess with time and space and add in multiple versions of the same characters.

Next up: Dr Dolittle (Rex Harrison} vs. Dr Dolittle (Eddie Murphy) vs. Dr Dolittle (Phillip Schofield} vs. Eliza Dolittle (Audrey Hepburn).

[Bewilderer]

easy, Eliza Dolittle.
Audrey actually sings and puts on such a terrible [censored]-er-ney accent that they all have to flee.

[Myopic Aardvark]

*nudges bewilderer* - next?

[EasyTiger]

hmm too busy picturing Audrey Hepburn slightly sweaty and out of breath to think of another fight!! - oops did I just type that out!! ;)

[EasyTiger]

hmm looks like everyone else has taken time out to contmeplate Audrey Hepburn post fight too.
To keep the ball rolling how about The A Team vs The Dukes of Hazzard

[Stasisesque]

[ QUOTE ]
easy, Eliza Dolittle.
Audrey actually sings and puts on such a terrible [censored]-er-ney accent that they all have to flee.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd agree with you there, if it weren't for the fact that Audrey Hepburn could sing; her voice wasn't used as it wasn't strong enough over the chorus.

[EasyTiger]

Stop talking about the beautiful woman - Ive got work to do and just plain can't concentrate now!!!

[Stasisesque]

I'm sorry, I won't mention Edda Van Heemstra Hepburn-Ruston anymore.

[EasyTiger]

lol - been on IMDB? :)

anyway to avoid any more thread hijacking -

Avon Kerr from Blakes 7 vs Riker from Star Trek

[Stasisesque]

[ QUOTE ]
lol - been on IMDB? :)


[/ QUOTE ]

No, have book on filmstars birth names ;) *shuts up now*

[Myopic Aardvark]

At first, Riker and Avon work together, in order to defeat a mad scientist. Riker is just concerned about escape, but Avon wants the money too.

Unfortunately, given a choice between dying, the money and throwing Riker off the back of the spaceship they are on, Avon goes with his gut.

Riker is unable to hide as well as Vila might, so he's thrown from the back of the ship because he doesn't know how to fight dirty.

Ignoring the plastic cube at the back of the spaceship :), Avon fires the thrusters and escapes the planet.

Winner - Kerr Avon!

Next up. A feather duster versus a plastic alarm clock

[The_Braain]

Well,the only power a plastic alarm clock has is to get louder and more annoying,but since feather dusters have no ears it wouldn't do anything.But..

wait,why am i bothering to comment on feather dusters and alarms :confused: :confused: :D :)

Here's a sensible one.....Wal-Mart .v. the American Public

[Sayia]

Quite simple that one the Wall Mart its just too good to be true.......it boggles ones mind thinking about how it could be that good............ :p :confused:


Next

Cloud Strife (Pre Advent Children) Vs. Dante Sparda ( at the Devil May Cry 1 stage)

[_Chi_]

Dante, easy.

I mean, anyone that can reload a sawn-off with one arm can win anyfight, right?

Mike Tyson (on steroids, and after being starved for 2 months) against the Back Alley Brawler?

[Myopic Aardvark]

Tyson, because Brawler squeals like a girl when his ears are removed.

Next up, British Telecom vs. Vodafone (and OFCOM are not allowed to intercede)

[Silver_Weasel]

Please insert our MD's payrise for the next half hour

BT win due to actually charging reasonable prices compared to Vodaphone for last month's phone bill.

Whiskas vs. Kit-E-Kat?

[Stasisesque]

"I took it upon myself to do extensive research into this query. The test cat was put through two weeks of torture, uh, I mean, harmless scientific experiment, the first week of which he ate only Whiskas, the second, Kit-E-Kat.

Once the test period was up, I asked the cat what he thought of the products and which he would choose. He answered, simply, "Meow," and we all know what that means, chaps."

Super Noodles vs. Pot Noodles.

[Myopic Aardvark]

Super Noodles obviously

*shudders at the thought of even considering Pot Noodles*

Bleugh....

Neil Armstrong vs A Mars Attacks! Martian

[DreamWeaver]

Amongst Neil's other talents, he also won the All-Switzerland yodelling championship in 1958. No contest.



It's a small world after all...

Mickey Mouse (representing Disneyland)
vs
Shamu the Killer Whale (representing Sea World)
vs
The Hulk (representing Universal Islands Of Adventure)
vs
Agent J (representing Universal Studios)
vs
Aerosmith (representing Disney Studios)
vs
Percy The Owl (representing Paulton's Pleasure Park, Romsey, Hampshire, whose damn ad annoys the **** out of me)

[Duckdee]

[ QUOTE ]
Amongst Neil's other talents, he also won the All-Switzerland yodelling championship in 1958. No contest.



It's a small world after all...

Mickey Mouse (representing Disneyland)
vs
Shamu the Killer Whale (representing Sea World)
vs
The Hulk (representing Universal Islands Of Adventure)
vs
Agent J (representing Universal Studios)
vs
Aerosmith (representing Disney Studios)
vs
Percy The Owl (representing Paulton's Pleasure Park, Romsey, Hampshire, whose damn ad annoys the **** out of me)

[/ QUOTE ]
Why are the fights that are unanswered, when I get to them, big complexicated ones?!!?

[Chiefette]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Amongst Neil's other talents, he also won the All-Switzerland yodelling championship in 1958. No contest.



It's a small world after all...

Mickey Mouse (representing Disneyland)
vs
Shamu the Killer Whale (representing Sea World)
vs
The Hulk (representing Universal Islands Of Adventure)
vs
Agent J (representing Universal Studios)
vs
Aerosmith (representing Disney Studios)
vs
Percy The Owl (representing Paulton's Pleasure Park, Romsey, Hampshire, whose damn ad annoys the **** out of me)

[/ QUOTE ]
Why are the fights that are unanswered, when I get to them, big complexicated ones?!!?

[/ QUOTE ]
You could always use the all-purpose get out clause of 'WWWIAFB' (Who Would Win In A Fight Between?) by saying something along the lines of (in decreasing maturity)
a) Society
b) Chuck Norris comes and kills them all
c) Your face
d) Well its a very major fight but ooo a penny *runs off and chases*

Chiefette

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
Mickey Mouse (representing Disneyland)
vs
Shamu the Killer Whale (representing Sea World)
vs
The Hulk (representing Universal Islands Of Adventure)
vs
Agent J (representing Universal Studios)
vs
Aerosmith (representing Disney Studios)
vs
Percy The Owl (representing Paulton's Pleasure Park, Romsey, Hampshire, whose damn ad annoys the **** out of me)


[/ QUOTE ]

On the basis that one is imbuded with super strength and is nearly indestructible I would say.....go Percy the Owl go, kick yankee behind you big ol' bird you!

On an equally titanic scale how about;

David Blaine (Non-swimmer, pouncy American show-off)

vrs.

Paul Daniels (Mr Television)

and for my next trick....

[EasyTiger]

[ QUOTE ]


Quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Amongst Neil's other talents, he also won the All-Switzerland yodelling championship in 1958. No contest.



It's a small world after all...

Mickey Mouse (representing Disneyland)
vs
Shamu the Killer Whale (representing Sea World)
vs
The Hulk (representing Universal Islands Of Adventure)
vs
Agent J (representing Universal Studios)
vs
Aerosmith (representing Disney Studios)
vs
Percy The Owl (representing Paulton's Pleasure Park, Romsey, Hampshire, whose damn ad annoys the **** out of me)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why are the fights that are unanswered, when I get to them, big complexicated ones?!!?

[/ QUOTE ]

easy - its a draw and they all skip off merrily into the sunset... ... until Shamu remembers that he is unable to skip and is in fact a KILLER whale and scoffs all the pink ones!!

how about Stephen J Cannell vs Glen A Larson (for the old school :)

[Sayia]

Stephen J Cannel easy

he would just Hire The A Team and call the greatest american hero too they would make some sort of weapon together possibaly some sort of suit for Mr.T so he can throw some more people over cars again for old times sake :p

Ok who would win......

Bender Vs. Cyborg

[KeeperOfSorrows]

[ QUOTE ]
David Blaine (Non-swimmer, pouncy American show-off)

vrs.

Paul Daniels (Mr Television)

and for my next trick....

[/ QUOTE ]

You'll like the result of this. Not a lot...

[Animal_Mutha_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
You'll like the result of this. Not a lot...


[/ QUOTE ]

"The lovely Miss Debbie McGeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

Next fight please.

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
Ok who would win......

Bender Vs. Cyborg

[/ QUOTE ]

Ahem, using a quote here.

"And the winner is Bennnnnnnderrrrrrrrrrr!"

Next up

Bart Simpson versus Bill Gates

[EasyTiger]

Bart Simpson puts up a good fight, Homer comes to join in mostly by sitting on Bill.
But at the end of the day you just can't touch the AntiChrist!!
Bill Gates wins and even convinces Bart to sacrifice Millhouse to the great Binary God.

How about ... ... ...

Marvin the Martian vs Wile E Coyote?

[Sayia]

Id say that would be a draw if they was having a IQ test.......

Next Up

Barret Vs. Mr T

[Hell_Kitty]

Easy one for that. Barret being allowed to shoot people nad Mr T. unable to makes it rather one sided.

Barret FTW

COH Euro Vs COH US

[Silver_Weasel]

CoH Euro has Me, easy win ;)

Arthur Dent vs. Twoflower vs. Jerry Cornelius vs. Doctor Who in a 'Most Distance Travelled' match.

[UltraNova]

Silver as much as i believe in your power.. the americans do out number us by quite abit and have the almighty power fo the nerf bat in the form of the stateman aka jack. Althought i don't doubt your ability to take on 5 or 6 servers.. states would nerf your [censored] so bad you could hit a lvl 1 contaimated. Would be an awesome battle tho, wel more funny than awesome.

Dr. Who no? He Just go back in time and travel the universe again and again and again and again and again and again and again........

What about superman verus statesman?

[KeeperOfSorrows]

[ QUOTE ]
CoH Euro has Me, easy win ;)

[/ QUOTE ]

Ah, but what about when the Jerk Hackers turn up? Then it's all gone TO TEH AMERICANS!!

Sure we've had Superman Vs Statesman before, with the conclusion along the lines of Supes being ED'd into submission.

Now:

Sam (Cheers)
vs.
Joey (Friends)
vs.
Riker (Star Trek: TNG)
vs.
Kirk (Star Trek: TOS)
vs.
Quincy (Quincy)
vs.
Don Juan
vs.
Casonova

The competition: to collect the greatest number of womens phone-numbers.
The venue: The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

[DreamWeaver]

Contest cancelled as Johnny Depp drops in for spot of lunch. All female life-forms in proximity scream, melt, or spontaneously explode depending on their fandom level and chemical structure.

Winner: Captain Jack.

K-9 vs Twiki?

[Silver_Weasel]

K-9 has a great sense of humour and a laser.

Twiki is the hand-droid for Dr. Theopolis. Even with Col Wilma Deering nearby, no-one really cares as "Biiddy Biidy Beep" gets chargrilled.

On that note
Buck Rogers (Buster Crabbe) vs Buck Rogers (Gil Gerard)?

[The_Braain]

Even tho ive never seen either i have to go wit that Gil guy.[censored] kind of name is Buster???

Next: Calgon .v.s. The giant limescale monster!!

:mad:
\!/
/ \ &lt;---giant limescale monster

[Frazzle_d]

Calgon has an ace up his sleeve in the form of a pre-Cif industrial sized container of creamy JIF! The cleaning foam of champions.

Limescale succumbs shortly thereafter.

On that note:

Mr. Muscle vs. Mr. Sheen (from the Pledge adverts)

[Karekov]

Muscle! Easily. ;o

Sabertooth vs Wolverine.

Classic. xD

EDIT: Err. Was on wrong page.

[The_Braain]

[ QUOTE ]

Sabertooth vs Wolverine.

[/ QUOTE ]

&lt;Yawn&gt; but still....Volverine kills Sabretoothe cos he's got metal claws instead of stupid animal claws + is faster

Next: Church&amp;Tucker .v.s. Grif&amp;Simmons (Red v.s Blue for those of u who are confused)

[Lost_samurai_EU]

griff and simmons get into an argument regarding the point of them being there, meanwhile kaboose manages to kill church again mistaking him for a ghost. meanwhile tucker continues complaining that he didnt get the sniper rifle again. At this point sarge finally kills griff after getting fed up with his constate failures leaving it as simmons vs tucker

both have only the standard issue gun and run fo cover before having an insult fight at each other, meanwhile church posseses sarge again and kills simmons from behind before being shot again by kaboose.
tucker emerges victorious only to be killed by tex who is finally fed up with the lot of them.
winner tex

golden crusader vs incredible pyro
you decide the kind of match

[War_Hero_EU]

It's a knee deep belly button fluff handicap match. The initial repartee of powers exchanged back forth goes on, insps galore are pumped and the fight looks to be going on for some time... However, an incredibly drunk and currently unemployed Childcatcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang leaps into the naval lint filled pit laughing maniacally and swoops them unawares into his oversized butterfly net.

In fits of laughter both incredible pyro and golden crusader allow themselves to be taken captive in the back of a transforming ice cream van. After the hysteria dies down, they show the Catcher some ID. The Catcher noting his faux par, slaps his forehead and heads off the The Nag's Head for a pint of gasoline.

The match is voided :(

Next up!

a custard pie toting Hercule Poirot vs. a wet tea towel armed Jessica Fletcher (Murder She Wrote)
This fiercely contested match up takes place in the library.

[Lost_samurai_EU]

whatever you are taking can you send a bit my way war.


After a long argument regarding whose books are better poirot hurls the custard pie wildy at Fletcher who merely wipes it off before going into a tirade about why he would do such a thing, however as her voice escalates she is spotted by the librarian and kicked out for being to noisy.
match Poirot.

next up. All the pokemon ever vs a group of badgehunters.

contest to see who can catch the opposing team first

[Arctic_Princess]

So, Pokemon (the whole pantheon!) vs. badge hunters


Due to the laws of natural selection, Pokemon are scared of humans who aren't their trainers and badge hunters are crazy, single-minded people with a thirst for grinding the same group of Fake Nems for that elusive badge! Remember this kids, it's important. - nonetheless:

Fire pokemon spend all their time chasing after bug/grass/ice pokemon, the water pokemon chase after the fire pokemon, the electric after water etc. etc. - Without a human nearby to issue even the most basic commands, the pokemon are defenceless.

HOWEVER - just as badge-hunter 1 reaches the top of the Volcano on Striga for her SG's Striga Beacon badge, she is flattened by a Golem which she mistook for a rocky outcrop. The rest of the team go flying at it but, unfortunately, the golem is in full roll and flattens the lot of them, making a multi-coloured mess on the side of the volcano...

Later on, a group of controllers and a tank manage to subdue the runaway Golem and send it to the Zig where it learns how to be a proper criminal. On its release, Runaway Golem has become a fully-fledged member of the Council and is put on guard duty at the Volcano mouth in Striga.

One day some badge hunters (different group but still caffeine-addicted zealots) come a-looking round Striga for badges when they get inadventerntly flattened by Runaway Golem - or Runaway Golem Cor Leonis as he's now called.

It's the CIIIIIIIIRCLE of LIIIIIIIIIIFE!

(The original group of pokemon were all eaten by Warwolves, in case anyone was wondering....)

:D

Right-o, next up:

Charlotte Church vs Hayley Westenra vs The St. Winifred's School Choir

[Lost_samurai_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
So, Pokemon (the whole pantheon!) vs. badge hunters


Due to the laws of natural selection, Pokemon are scared of humans who aren't their trainers and badge hunters are crazy, single-minded people with a thirst for grinding the same group of Fake Nems for that elusive badge! Remember this kids, it's important. - nonetheless:

Fire pokemon spend all their time chasing after bug/grass/ice pokemon, the water pokemon chase after the fire pokemon, the electric after water etc. etc. - Without a human nearby to issue even the most basic commands, the pokemon are defenceless.

HOWEVER - just as badge-hunter 1 reaches the top of the Volcano on Striga for her SG's Striga Beacon badge, she is flattened by a Golem which she mistook for a rocky outcrop. The rest of the team go flying at it but, unfortunately, the golem is in full roll and flattens the lot of them, making a multi-coloured mess on the side of the volcano...

Later on, a group of controllers and a tank manage to subdue the runaway Golem and send it to the Zig where it learns how to be a proper criminal. On its release, Runaway Golem has become a fully-fledged member of the Council and is put on guard duty at the Volcano mouth in Striga.

One day some badge hunters (different group but still caffeine-addicted zealots) come a-looking round Striga for badges when they get inadventerntly flattened by Runaway Golem - or Runaway Golem Cor Leonis as he's now called.

It's the CIIIIIIIIRCLE of LIIIIIIIIIIFE!

(The original group of pokemon were all eaten by Warwolves, in case anyone was wondering....)

:D

Right-o, next up:

Charlotte Church vs Hayley Westenra vs The St. Winifred's School Choir

[/ QUOTE ]

freakin brilliant my good man, a well thought out and accurate example, you have my respect, and this CoH rucksack that can spontaneously combust when mixed with fire and napalm

[Arctic_Princess]

La! I always wanted one of tho-

&lt;explodes into tiny pieces&gt;

[War_Hero_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
next up:

Charlotte Church vs Hayley Westenra vs The St. Winifred's School Choir


[/ QUOTE ]

Come on..... somebody! I would but I have no idea who that Hayley girl is :confused: :p

[Silver_Weasel]

This might help (http://www.hayleywestenra.com/)

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
This might help (http://www.hayleywestenra.com/)

[/ QUOTE ]

...Why can't she play CoH?

[Myopic Aardvark]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
This might help (http://www.hayleywestenra.com/)

[/ QUOTE ]

...Why can't she play CoH?

[/ QUOTE ]

Maybe she does ;)

[EasyTiger]

Well this post seems to have paled off a touch so I'll try and kick start it again with a battle of the Gunslingers,

The Man with No Name vs Roland of Gilead

[Lost_samurai_EU]

this starts as a clasic western stare down. tuble weed rolls by and the two combatants eye each other carefully. a gust of wind pciks up and two shots are heard, both men fall to the floor dead.

and that is what shall happen if thse two are ever forced to fight each other, which is why it must be stopped, so says the oracle.

Winner: what the ??? lets go with whoever appreciates them still being alive

next Wii (revolution) vs Xbox360 vs PS3

[Acenra]

I'm doin' this one

the nintendo Wii blitzed the last E3. it must be said, the grahics arent as good as the PS3's but thats not the point, they focused on gamplay, meaning their games were a good laugh and highly adictive

the PS3 spent all it's money on graphics, so the games looked good, but because they focused on graphics, the game play was boring and predictive. during the last E3, people were actually running through the sony section to join the six our long qeue for the nintendo section.

the xbox 360 is kind of in the middle. I wont talk about the last E3 for it because it was already released. but it has improved graphics and gameplay.

I know this is personal opinion, but I'm making the Nintendo Wii the winner, with the xbox 360 comming in a close second. it looks so good. look at games like Red Steel, which has AI enemies with amazingly fluid movements, so sword fighting is a alot more fun and less blocky.

[DreamWeaver]

If it's an open round this round - I propose a villainous face-off for a change...

General Zod (http://www.generalzod.net)
vs
Ming The Merciless (http://www.mingthemerciless.com/thats_my_ming.html)
vs
Professor James Moriarty (http://internationalhero.co.uk/m/moriarty.htm)
vs
Count Moriarty (and Hercules Gryptype-Thynne) (http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbc7/comedy/progpages/goons.shtml)

[Silver_Weasel]

On the fifth moon of *****, Ming sits. Sits and waits. There is an intruder in his kingdom. Four intruders. No matter, they will soon bow before Ming the Merciless. His favoured daughter sighs again. It is so difficult to find a suitor that lasts more than an hour.


Zod stands again on a different planet. A vile contemptible planet. A Planet that will not DARE to usurp the Authority of Zod. In the distance lies a dull abode of the so called Ruler. Zod flies off in the direction of the castle so ALL may kneel before Zod.

Professor James Moriarty wipes himself down and looks at his surroundings. An interesting development indeed. Now that he has left the confines of the Enterprise, he finds himself in a strange castle in a stranger area. As guards stamp past he hides himself in the shadows and waits; watches; contemplates and then, with a destination in mind, moves.

"Ooh, Money, money, money, money. It's been so long that we had money that I can hardly remember what it tastes like!"
"Be quiet Moriarty. I have an idea."
"Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh typhoo."
"Please don't do that. Now, my twisted little friend, I have an inscrutable plan."
"Oooooooooo...."
*FX SLAP*
"...oooooooooow! Why did you hit me on the head?"
"It's the same size as my hand. Now, all we have to do is convince the Emperor that we are natives of this land and we are in hard custard..."
"Hard Custard?"
"The worst kind. With skin. and nails. Once that is done, he will pay us the monies and we shall escape in this little string powered rocket ship."
"Brilliant. Utterly Brilliant. A plan so brilliant that it's brilliance is more brilliant that any brilliant plan...."
"Moriarty?"
"...Yes?"
*FX SLAP*
"And next time it will be real! And now, let us depart!"
"But I like dis-part. Look at the lavish scenery"
"Listeners may now imagine something terribly expensive that the BBC could not possibly afford as all of it's Special Effects were used up on Doctor Who."
*FX PENNY DROP*
"Thank you. Meanwhile at the Castle
*SOUNDS OF WOMEN SCREAMING IN ECTASY*
"Ooops, sorry, that was the Castle Anthrax. In Ming's Castle....."

Ming looks down on the two new arrivals.
"Klytus, who are these two?"
"Strange, your Majesty, they seem to be delegates from obscure regions of your kingdom known as the B B C Home Service."

*FX PENNY DROP*
"Thank you."

"Permit me to introduce ourselves. I am the diplomat from the kingdom of Nafi, High Lord Gryptype-Thynne, and this is my faithful sidekick Count Jim "Flash"....."
"Aaaaaaaaah!"
"...You silly twisted little boy. Moriarty."
"And what tribute do you bring us from NAFI?"
"We bring you the finest BBC Canteen sausage rolls!"
"That is nothing but a rock."
"Ah, I see you've been to the Canteen already. Now, about the monies."
"Yes. Klytus will take your tribute to me, or take your lives. The choice is yours. Or rather, mine."
"I just have them in this baboon shaped suitcase that I carry with me at all times, but first, Max Geldry and his one-armed harmonica."


[Musical Interlude : "*****'s Way"]..Interrupted by...

*FX WINDOW SMASH*
"ALL WILL KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!"
Ming sits. Ming watches.
"You are the Ruler of this place?"
Ming nods.
"You will not kneel?"
Ming shakes his head.
"I see. I was told you were proud. Far too proud for your own good."
ZOD releases his laser beam eyes at Ming, but they strike a invisible shield in front of him, and reflect back at him, seering his skin.
"Pitiful Creature, you fly into my throne room in my castle and you expect me to be undefended? I have survived attempts by countless assassins and you are possibly one of the worst. Klytus, remove him."
Klytus walks up and stops halfway.
"You are afraid? You are right to be afraid. I fear no man. Kneel to no man. Give tribute to no man.
"No, I don't think you do. But you might to a rock."
Klytus throws off his robe to reveal JAMES MORIARTY carrying a rock of green Kryptonite.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" (c) James Earl Jones
Unseen, Princess Ardela slips off behind the curtain.
"Now, my gaelic brethren..."
/Peter_Kay "Garlic Bretheren?"
"...No adlibbing in my scene. We shall depart from here post haste and interrogate that saucy little minx behind the curtains."

"You are not Klytus."
"No Sire, I am James Moriarty and I bow to you, Emperor Ming and bring you a tribute that will surpass that of all the others."
"Speak before I become bored."
"I speak of a ship know as the Enterprise..."



"Now, my saucy little Ardala, you will hand over the monies or I shall release the power of Moriarty's second-hand satchel wax upon you."
"I sense you are feeling overwhelming thoughts of lust towards me despite my Cockney accent ,Guv'nor. Troi to Enterprise, we have found Moriarty. Three to beam up."
"This must be one of those foreign channels the BBC could never afford these special effects.
*FX PENNY DROP*
"Thank you."

"So, you are the rogue Hologram? Permit me to introduce myself, I am Captain Jean Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise."
*FX SLAP*
"What in the blazes was that for?"
"People have been wanting to do that since the show began, baldie. Now, my dear Captain, may I ask what is this holodeck of yours and is there monies involved?"
"Well certainly, you can go anyplace, anytime...."
*FX ZOOM(x2)
"...anywhere. Well, Counsellor, that seems to have taken care of that problem."

FX: USUAL SHIP ROCKING FROM SIDE TO SIDE AND KLAXONS GO OFF (see Any episode of Star Trek ever.)

"Captain, I'm sensing great hostility from the Planet Below."
"No [censored], Sherlock. Evasive Maneuvers!"

*FX Communication Pipe*
"Captain Picard. This is Ming the Merciless. I advise you to surrender immediately or I shall destroy your ship."
"Never. Not whilst there is still a chance to save ourselves!"
"Shall I rewerse the polarity of the tachyon flow, Keptin?"
"Wrong series Chekov. We're going to do things the Picard way. I happen to have some old friends in the area."

"We are the borg . You will be assimilated . Resistance is , and always has been , futile . CHEERS FOR THAT, LOCUTUS"

"That should show them how a proper Science Fiction Show should be done. No Underdressed Women and Huge Hulking Men on this show. Never. Now, I really have to go, Number One."

*FX WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH *

=========The End!========= (http://www.geocities.com/Area51/3253/tos/03/space_puppet_balok_03_tcv_216.jpg)

Winners : Count Moriarty (and Hercules Gryptype-Thynne) as the Goon Show can go on in Hologram form forever! :)

Next Round

Coke Zero vs. Vanilla Jammy Dodgers vs. Baked Bean Crisps vs. Squeezy Marmite

[Frazzle_d]

Did Stase just propose to you or what?! (#5)

[Silver_Weasel]

[ QUOTE ]
Did Stase just propose to you or what?! (#5)

[/ QUOTE ]

Not that I know of, but I'm a bloke; we just forget these things :)

[Frazzle_d]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Did Stase just propose to you or what?! (#5)

[/ QUOTE ]

Not that I know of, but I'm a bloke; we just forget these things :)

[/ QUOTE ]

OK, stop me if I'm going too far, but you have a ponytail, a silver ponytail at that, a grrl gamer love interest - you must be a ruddy wild one upstairs, if that's the kind of effort you put into pointless forum topic posts and then modestly shrug off any comment!

[Silver_Weasel]

.... :eek:

[Tac_Ops_Wolf]

ok, let's get back on topic, I'll set a new one.

Stasis vs Fireguardian

NOTE: Silver weasel is the referee

[Myopic Aardvark]

Winner: Whoever's selling the alcohol for that meet!!!

Next up: Jean Luc Picard vs Q (from James Bond)

[Stasisesque]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Did Stase just propose to you or what?! (#5)

[/ QUOTE ]

Not that I know of, but I'm a bloke; we just forget these things :)

[/ QUOTE ]

OK, stop me if I'm going too far, but you have a ponytail, a silver ponytail at that, a grrl gamer love interest - you must be a ruddy wild one upstairs, if that's the kind of effort you put into pointless forum topic posts and then modestly shrug off any comment!

[/ QUOTE ]

Reeow.

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
ok, let's get back on topic, I'll set a new one.

Stasis vs Fireguardian

NOTE: Silver weasel is the referee

[/ QUOTE ]

Firstly, I bribe Weasel with the money he needs for a certain 'house' he's trying to buy in another game, and whilst he's distracted, beat down on Stasis with my hugely knowledgeable Harry Potter theories.

Who wins? Voldemort.

Next up:

Clash of the Golden Titans, with the title of "Most useless and irrelevant one line poster" in the balance.

Now, all we need are two people who make short, completely irrelevant posts, with the word "Golden" in their forum names....hmmm. Fraz as referee, if we can find anyone suitable.

[UltraNova]

I did just hear someone needed a random poster?

[Frazzle_d]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Did Stase just propose to you or what?! (#5)

[/ QUOTE ]

Not that I know of, but I'm a bloke; we just forget these things :)

[/ QUOTE ]

OK, stop me if I'm going too far, but you have a ponytail, a silver ponytail at that, a grrl gamer love interest - you must be a ruddy wild one upstairs, if that's the kind of effort you put into pointless forum topic posts and then modestly shrug off any comment!

[/ QUOTE ]

Reeow.

[/ QUOTE ]

Family forum, family forum! *runs*

[Lost_samurai_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Did Stase just propose to you or what?! (#5)

[/ QUOTE ]

Not that I know of, but I'm a bloke; we just forget these things :)

[/ QUOTE ]

OK, stop me if I'm going too far, but you have a ponytail, a silver ponytail at that, a grrl gamer love interest - you must be a ruddy wild one upstairs, if that's the kind of effort you put into pointless forum topic posts and then modestly shrug off any comment!

[/ QUOTE ]

Reeow.

[/ QUOTE ]

Family forum, family forum! *runs*

[/ QUOTE ]

first off whoever was selling the beer ill take 10 bottles, one of those funny hats to if possible second of all the fight

lets try golden crusader versus golden_girl.

Crusader opens with a half dozen suggestions causing major locking and pushing him up the offtopic bar. GG responds with several small one line posts which keep dying threads alive for a few seconds longer, earning her double exp for helping fill the forums. this continues until they both meet in general discussion and cause a tear in reality, transporting them into the game.

It ends rather quickly with golden refusing to fight because he would only be able to kill his opponent while using a katana, rather than arresting them.

Golden_girl is the winner.

Next round Frazzle_d with an army of pokemon vs stasis and silver_weasel

[Silver_Weasel]

Fraz can win, it's time for bed for us ;)

Buzby (BT) vs
Sid (British Gas) vs
Griffin (Midland Bank/HSBC) vs
J.R.Hartley (Yellow Pages) vs
Charley the Cat (mreowreowreow) (Safety Adverts) vs
Tufty the Squirrel (Road Safety)?

(Yes I know I'm old :) )

[Lethargy_EU]

I think this (http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/285267) is quite fitting to this thread.

[Fire_Guardian_EU]

[ QUOTE ]
I think this (http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/285267) is quite fitting to this thread.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ah, the Ultimate Showdown. Yes, it's quite suitable, as you've noted. As have many, many others... ;)

[Lethargy_EU]

Oh boy, do I ever fail at the internet today. Not only did I post something already posted, but I didn't play the game either!

To try and rectify my erroneous ways; I must logically conclude that J.R.Hartley is the winner of that fight. He's the only one I'm aware of existing. So he obviously beat the others to a bloody pulp before my time.
It's a shame I missed the fight so I can't fill in the exact details. But I know he's the only one to have died of natural causes.

Murray the Demonic Talking Skull (Monkey island) Vs. Bob the Killer Goldfish without his feline minions (Earthworm Jim)?

[ClockworkGolem]

Mr T vs. Chuck Norris, if it's not already been suggested.

Irrestistable Force meets Immovable Object.

[Red_Saint]

Winner: Mr T, because Chuck Norris is overused.

Next match: Jesus and all twelve disciples (as well as Judas, who (due to some horror RPG) is a vampire) VS Jean Luc Picard and all his crew. The match takes place in a giant vat of melted chocolate, floating 8,000 feet in the air over the magical fairy land.
/discuss.

[Frazzle_d]

Troi goes sick when she realises it's chocolate and turns off everyone's brains so she can eat it all.

Next up!

Chiefette vs. The Lurpak butter with the trumpet.

[Silver_Weasel]

In this heat, Chiefette wins. Bleuuurgh.

G-Force(Space Ninja Gatchaman) vs Batman, Robin, Batgirl, Alfred and the Huntress.